At this point if anyone believes anything he says is anything but a complete lie then they aren't worth arguing with, the evidence, the literal mountains of evidence are overwhelming.

But his haircut is so goofy! He's just a silly goose! He didn't mean it!

ahem /s

I didn't see this had already been posted but @alyaza suggested I reposted my post's body as a comment:

Great news! The blonde bombshite has been throughly disgraced, for those who aren’t aware of how British politics works a 10 day suspension is very much ‘resign in disgrace, your career is now over’ territory and he got 90; this was suggested by the committee only because the bar to expel a member entirely is incredibly high.

For those who aren’t aware of the partygate scandal during our fairly lengthy and strict lockdowns when everything was going to shit and loads of people lost their livelihoods or had to watch loved ones die alone over Zoom this man was on the TV laying down the law. It turns out the whole time Johnson was basically on a bender, holding parties for him and his friends in his official residences then lied to Parliament and the public about it. On top of that (although this isn’t what sank him) it turns out there was more or less open corruption going on at the highest levels of government over that period.

So a former Prime Minister and former President with surnames meaning 'dick' and 'fart' are both going 'tits up'.

And then he tried to intimidate the commission and leaked some of the findings, so they decided to suspend him for 90 days instead of 20 and ban him from Westminster altogether. No more free meals for youuu.

No! You don't say...

# /s