this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2024
809 points (99.1% liked)

Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] [email protected] 91 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Mine occasionally does a swearword role call. To be fair he came to me with this vocabulary and I don't have kids so I let him get it out of his system. What's really funny is that he'll mix and match words to make up something completely new. I have to make sure he doesn't see or hear me laughing at it to ensure he isn't getting the reaction he wants. First rule of parrots is that if it gets a reaction it's game on.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What is the funniest, cutest or weirdest words or phrases that he has picked up from you

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oh there are plenty but recently he declared my husband to be a "Bert-hole." He knows how to say and use the word "asshole" but in this case he replaced "ass" with his own name. They both love to irritate each other.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The bird is thinking that your husband doesn't deserve being called an asshole and called him a cloacahole instead. Just didn't know the word "cloaca".

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

Maybe it’s mispronouncing the word ‘butt’.

[–] [email protected] 74 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I immediately thought of these two.

Statler & Waldorf

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago
[–] [email protected] 59 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah I rarely go to the zoo. That would make me go more.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

4 real I wanna get roasted!

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Okay you nasty thot (how am I doing so far?):-P

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Oh yeah you like that you little retard, want me to beat you some more?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Since people seem not to have gotten the reference, this is the original

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

I got the reference but thought the modification unnecessary.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago
[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 week ago (2 children)

That would be their top attraction! I would make a side trip to get roasted by parrots.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It'd be like Triumph the insult dog. They could have segregated the exhibit so that if you're a pearl clutching parent you can avoid it but this could have been a great way to raise money.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 week ago

Based on the couple of parrots I've met IRL, the birds would also be having a fantastic time hanging out with four of their buddies and cussing out humans.

Lose/lose all around.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Save the gas! I can do it right here you fucking disheveled fucktart!

[–] Honytawk 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It ... isn't the same

Unless you are a bird called Tylor Durdon

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Bwaaaaaawk...I tried

Poly want a cracker?

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I knew someone that had parrots. If the humans around them swear, it is easy for the birds to learn swear words because swear words are often used with animated emotion, and in short, loud phrases. Sadly, birds that learn swear words lose a lot of their resale value, or are deemed undesirable by perspective buyers.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

When I was a kid, our neighbor had parrots.

They learned the cry of my baby sister

When their door/window to their room was open, they imitated it so well, that my mom went to the bedroom of my sister to check on her, just to find her sleeping in her bed

This happened a couple times until my mom figured out it was the parrots

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago

I feel like the whole point of a talking pet is teaching it to swear at you

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The same park is probably also debating how they can attract more visitors to their location

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Not being in Lincolnshire would probably be the best bet.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 week ago

They are back:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lincolnshire-67990806

"The original five parrots, named Billy, Tyson, Eric, Jade and Elsie, spent three months in isolation as a result of their antics before they were put back on display. They have since become the park's star attraction, according to Mr Nichols.

A disclaimer notice was installed at the enclosure warning those of "a sensitive nature" about the birds' colourful language. "

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Just send them to a zoo where people speak a different language. Problem solved!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago

Continuing the age old tradition of learning foreign languages by starting with swears and insults

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

A place where people don't understand English swear words... good luck!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Learn to swear at people while in captivity. Teach friend. Learn to enjoy it with friend.

Get removed.

I bet they swore up a storm while they were being removed. Probably less laughing.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Or victory.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

Statler and Waldorf, still together after all these years.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

Isn't that what we do? Dumb fuck zookeepers lol

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

I remember a local zoo that had a sign saying "If the parrots swear at you it's (usually) not meant personally.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

This made me wish that someone made an attraction like the Tiki Room at Disney Land, but with real birds, singing flowers, and magic totems instead of animatronics.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I mean they are African, I believe they can say that word...

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Swears not slurs, fuckface

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Jokes are jokes. Your mother was a terrible teacher, swearing includes slurs, you know words that offend some people.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

My mother is literally an award-winning English teacher; you're just not funny.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Your mother was award-winning at a lot of things. The awards she received were behind the dumpster at the Chuckie cheeses.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Ok that was funnier.