this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 102 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

What kind of childhood did you have if you don't know what grass tastes like.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Honytawk 27 points 2 weeks ago

Maybe this was a particular patch of grass with extra flavour?

Like dog piss flavour.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago

Or an adult in with a hippie wheat grass stall in their farmers' market.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Don't eat grass, the silicates in it will seriously fuck up your teeth

[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I heard grass tastes allright if you sprinkle some oil and salt on it. Never tried it myself, though.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

corn is grass. rice is grass. a lot of other shit is grass too. heck, I'm grass.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

AND I'M GONNA MOW IT

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 47 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Only if it comes from the salad region of France.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

Yes, otherwise it’s just crispy grass.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 weeks ago

Real and straight. Anon didn't have sex.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago

Anon should've asked them for a doggie bag so he could take it home to eat later.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

Anon took a bait from a dog.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Honestly not the weirdest behavior you'd see in campus, and could almost be wholesome. Guy's down on the ground interacting with his dog; what's wrong with that? Also: it's at night - could they see he was actually eating grass, or did it look like he was just playing with his dog?

Also also: college campus... night... couple sitting on a bench... "sitting." College couples never only sit on secluded benches in the dark. OP probably interrupted a handy.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

Or more likely they were just about to light a blunt and you crashed their favorite smoke spot.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

Classic college behavior