this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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[–] [email protected] 159 points 6 days ago (1 children)

There's a story that Wong Wifu, the great Chinese martial artist... had a fight with a guy and beat him. Then the guy gave him this light tap. Wong looked at him and the guy just nodded. That was it. He had given him the death touch. Wong died.

Then and there?

No. About eighteen years later. That's the thing about Dim Mak... you never know when it's gonna take effect.

[–] [email protected] 72 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Statistically if you're born, at some point you will die. Being born is deadly.

[–] [email protected] 56 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate

[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

When did we run out of unique souls and added in NPCs?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

planning for a busy weekend?

[–] [email protected] 22 points 6 days ago (2 children)

About 90-95% of humans have died at some point in their lives so yeah very likely we will follow suit at some point.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 days ago (2 children)

It's more than that... I know you were joking but ...

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Estimates_of_historical_world_population

Yeah it's estimated but it's a shit ton of people so it's more like 99.9%

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 days ago

Hang on there based on the image, 7.95 billion alive today, 109 billion have lived and died, that's like 93% death rate not 99.9%. Is there some other figure on the page you're basing the 99.9% off?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago (2 children)

You underestimate the effects of population growth. There was a lot of time in prehistory but the population at any given point was tiny compared to today.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (2 children)

i remember an old article that said DNA shows that all current humans can be traced back to 7 women during the ice age.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago

There were probably more around at the time, all the other bloodlines just died off.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

And they were all neighbours in the same age and shared a WhatsApp group.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Those people were alive and died it doesn't matter... There have been more people dead than are currently living by a lot.

We don't care how many people were alive back than compared to today. It's the total amount to how many have died...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

We don’t care how many people were alive back than compared to today.

But that is exactly the ratio you claim to be 99.9% when in reality it is closer to 93%.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago

No your right, my bad I'm terrible at math and sick

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 days ago

Lies, damned lies, and statistics.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago

It's Greentext

[–] [email protected] 56 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 36 points 6 days ago

Tendies for the tendie throne.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 6 days ago

Blood for the blood god. Khorne loves him

[–] [email protected] 46 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Can I take a moment to talk to you about our one true lord and saviour, Satan?

[–] Jolteon 17 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Is Jehovah witness Satan different from regular Christian Satan?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 days ago (2 children)

No, in such a way that neither of those denominations represent Satan correctly.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

You've got me curious. Care to elaborate?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

Satan seems to be the good guy in the Bible, given there's scant evidence of a literal hell of eternal damnation. Even if any of this were real, god created hell, not Satan.

Satan never destroyed the entire world or nuked cities or anything like that. I can't think of a bad thing he does in the Bible except maybe the Job bet. And even then god is worse on that one.

Here are the tenets of the Satanic Temple. You decide.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

Eh, the concept of hell really varies a lot by denomination, from the classic burning hell in Catholicism to a more "internal" hell of separation from God in Eastern Orthodoxy. I personally subscribe a bit more to the latter than the former, because I don't understand why a loving god would punish his children who disobey for eternity. In this latter view, Satan is merely an angel who rebelled and was kicked out of God's presence, and thus his only goal is to ruin things for the rest of us.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

I've seen the tenets and absolutely agree with them. Don't think they seriously represent Satan though. I think the name is purely for shock. Religious types couldn't fathom a satanist being a decent person.