Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.
Rule: You must post before you leave.
Girls don’t break wind, they shatter it, and that’s why they’re breathtaking. That’s what my grandfather always used to say, until my grandmother stabbed him to death during a mental episode. Would have been funny if she suffocated him, but she didn’t seem to consider my need for irony
This was not a comment I expected to read on this post
Still a better love story than Twilight.
I hope it's because she ate an onion-heavy dish🥰
Bro what
Onions are good AND good for you! Sure, they fuel a low-to-medium risk biological agent when digested in sufficient quantities, but it's still better than eggy farts!:)))
I wish she would come and fart in my bed instead
I knew he was the one when we started laughing at eachother's nighttime farts.
My girlfriend said she knew when I opened the shower curtain and used my dick as a catapult to launch water at her.
Relationship goals
Like hell I’m going to let the girl of my dreams outfart me. The bedroom is going to be a hazmat crisis before I relent!
Farting *then lifting the edge of the duvet for a quick huff
And that's fine.
One time my wife farted herself awake, you can't not laugh at that
The girl of my dreams doesn’t know how to remove oligosaccharides making food 🤔
"guuuurl lemme get you some alpha galactosidase"
I can fix her
I would be as well, but I have to settle for farting at work at this moment.