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Lucky for me my parents were both "I didn't save anything for retirement, my kids will take care of me when I'm older", so I don't have to suffer through this.
I was sitting in the room while my friend's dad was having a argument with his horrible dad. The horrible dad threatened to write him out of his will, and my friend's dad respond, "Why do you think I'd want 1/6th of fuck all anyway?"
I wouldn't be so blunt with my mother about things, but every time she talks about inheritance I encourage her to just spend the money on herself. Anything will be spilt between 7 kids overall (3 hers, 4 my late step dad). She is holding on to an expensive ring because my very well off, money hungry sister, has basically demanded it, so I'm working behind the scenes to try get her to sell it so she can invest in making her last few years that much easier.
This is my parents. I found out from a relative that after my mom suffered an injury, that her husband was spending $2000 a month on fast food. Literally TWOOOOO THOUSAND dollars on fried chicken a month.
When the topic came up of them writing a will, they said that I'd be getting the family pictures. That's it.
The hospitals and retirement facilities plan to absorb every cent left.
I was sexually/otherwise abused by my mother for most of my life. When I brought it up to family, I was basically told to shut up about it/“go to therapy.” They spent thousands torturing me in troubled teen facilities, and provided me with nothing for college (which I paid for with multiple jobs and sex work.)
I will never own a house. I spent almost two years after my divorce to just be able to afford an apartment. My family has never valued me - I will not give them the comfort they denied when it is the end. My entire life has been a hell.
My family tells me "write a book then I will read it" and I just keep thinking:
Assholes, maybe instead just listen to me when I tell my stories you want to ignore so badly.
They couldn't even be bothered to spend thousands on me though and more than once in my life I have just been dropped off at street corners with hopes that I would disappear from their lives.
It sucks. While I may not know you, I know similar pain and know it's never easy. I hope you find comforts in the little things around you.
Watched my mom work her ass off to raise me and save everything she could for retirement. She got to do some fun things, but not enough. I'm glad she had good insurance and a little money saved for when she got sick. I inherited a house with a mortgage, taxes, insurance, and repairs that are bleeding me dry and I'm pulling money out of my retirement to cover it. I'm thankful that it's given my son a decent place to live for the last year and i hope to break even when we sell it. I'm fine with that. I didn't earn it. I didn't take care of her for money. If you're only helping your family because you want money, you suck and they're probably better off without you.
My father was extremely open about his plans to spend it all. My in laws as well. I did get a small inheritance once, a few thousand dollars from a great grandpa that went to me because the legal battle for it outlived my mom. I hope I get sentimental things from my grandparents because that's the remainder of my incoming inheritance
My dad just died destitute and my mother will probably have nothing when she passes. I’m ok with that, I am my own person. People complaining about losing out on inheritance are fucking spoiled brats. “ you spent the money you worked for? Boo hoo hoo, I wanted your money though “
This is a flippant and unproductive comment that ignores the fact that we have a culture of passing down what you have to your children so that they can have a better life than you had - something many of these boomers benefitted from.
I get not everybody is entitled to it but it’s kind of considered a major goal for a lot of Americans to do that for their children. Which means it reflects poorly on the boomers who have said “nah fuck you” after also pillaging our future for their wealth.
My boomer dad: you probably won't get anything because I'm paying [i.e. using my retirement] to take care of my [100 year old] mother
Me: that's understandable
I know poor and wealthy people in every generation. Why aren't we blaming the banks for the 08 crash, the politicians for taking away almost every social service and trying to take away more, and the psychopath CEOs who care about their dick measuring contests every quarter? This generational divide obscures the real issues.
My mom just wanted to make enough to spend it over her lifetime, and that seems fair to me. She got nothing from her parents and had to support her own mom in her old age, and didn't want to cost us anything.
I would argue that inheritance is a huge driver of inequality. I have gotten small amounts from the estate of my dad's parents (my dad died when I was 16) and a childless relative and even those amounts jumped us ahead some, I can imagine what some huge amount unearned would do - but it's just that. Unearned.
Middle class families passing down inheritance is not a driver of inequality.
A dozen individuals controlling 60% of the wealth in America is.
millennials may miss out
Love how that title makes it sound millennials are somehow to blame
I don't see that. To me it reads as guilt tripping the parents for wanting to spend the money they themselves earned.
Lucky for me my parents were both "I didn't save anything for retirement, my kids will take care of me when I'm older"
man I feel that. It's like raising a teenager.
"don't do that, it'll infect your PC."
"don't buy from there your card info will be stolen."
"no, Biden isn't going to round us up into camps."
"now we have to call and get you a new debit card."
"please don't buy so much junk food....why? because you have diabetes."
I eat far too much avocado toast to save for retirement or college. I'm happy to spend my twighlight years drinking myself to death under a highway overpass.
"I got mine."
This is fucking dumb. I told my parents to spend it up. I'm not entitled to it
What's infuriating about this? Why the heck should I inherit something I haven't worked for? I've always told my parents and grandparents that dying with an empty bank balance is the ideal way to go. Hell, preferably be in debt.
It comes from a time where your whole family lived in the same house and the kids eventually take care of their parents. In todays system where people usually dont live with their parents for very long, it doesnt really make sense anymore. People need money long before they get to the age where their parents die. Getting a bunch of money at 30, to establish a life/family, is much more useful and long term impactful than getting it at 50-60. So inheritance is a flawed idea from the start.
Inheritance is a stepping stone to get out of poverty over generations. If the next generation can build upon it.