You do deserve to be able to come out and feel safe regardless of if you are on HRT or if you are "passing" or not.
I'm 21 now, but I used be a highly anxious 17 year old with parents that had a hard time fully accepting me, so I can relate quite a bit. My anxiety and depression weighed on my very heavily, and eventually I decided that I would just bite the bullet and wear a dress in public at a busy park. At this point in time I wasn't on HRT, I didn't feel like I "passed", and I was extremely worried about people seeing me as some weirdo and making a big deal about it. To my surprise no one seemed care at all. I felt more comfortable coming out to people after this experience and many were supportive/okay with me being trans even though I felt like I looked too masculine and strange.
Anyways, your anxiety around coming out and passing reminded me of myself and my experiences, and I am hoping that I was able to show that it doesn't really matter if you pass or not. People understand that you are at the beginning of your transition and that it takes time. If they truly do value you, they will be supportive or will come around to it eventually. The first part of transitioning is the most difficult imo, but I swear it does get better and easier.
The Debian logo is very similar to the progynova logo (progynova is estrogen). The above image is probably inspired by that.