this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2022
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parenting

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Maybe an odd question, so I'll unpack it a bit. Back during the time of the Michael Brown shooting, I remember hearing about how black parents often have "the talk" with their kids about the pigs. About how they aren't there to help, about how to stay safe around them, etc.

I'm white, my kids are white, and I realized I need to have my own ACAB talk with them eventually. This weekend, my older toddler said to me "the police keep us safe". I'm guessing she picked it up from day care teachers because I don't let her watch any TV that glorifies pigs and I live in a kinda reactionary area.

When she asked, I kinda fumbled and just said "not really, the police don't keep people safe". I knew that wasn't a great answer but she's little so she just sorta heard it and then moved on to her next unrelated topic. I've been thinking about it. I have some time, but at some point I need to talk to her and tell her the truth about cops.

Do you all have any advice about how to explain the reality of policing in America to white kids? I'm making that "white" qualifier for a reason. In white spaces and communities, the copanganda kids face is intense. The cops are portrayed as these kind, benevolent peacemakers who are only there to help. And frankly, the cops themselves do a great job propagandizing white kids. They make sure to have all these positive interactions with them when they're young. That's what I have to fight against. I know because that was my experience as a white kid growing up. I never really had negative interactions with cops myself. Shitting on cops was very much socially forbidden among my Mayo-American social circle. And the last mental domino to fall in me becoming a leftist was realizing how absolutely shitty cops are and their real role in the system. I really want my kids to be able to see the cops for who they are, even though I know how much of an uphill battle that's going to be for me.

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

My son is seven years old and white. The way I've explained it to him is that the Cops (and our troops for that matter) are basically the Stormtroopers from Star Wars or the Fire Nation in Avatar. When they say they're "keeping us safe", what they really mean is they're making sure that they and the empire they serve stays in control and that we are behaving the way they want.

He tells me "All cops are bad" regularly and when they're around says we have to be like Obi-wan and Luke in Mos Eisley with the stormtroopers laying low. No...I don't know if I have gone about this in the best way, I'm 100% certain many of my peers would call it brainwashing, also mostly sure he's saying it because he knows its what I want to hear more than anything else, and I am genuinely worried I may have to explain myself to a teacher or god help me somebody in a family courtroom....but this is how I have parented my child and I will own it for better or worse.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

lmao we stan. laying low from the stormtropers in mos eisley is :chefs-kiss:

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

There was a comment made in the Pete/Kamala thread the other day that really resonated with me. It's very possible that their parents just assumed that since their own Marxist views were correct that they didn't need to be didactic and instead figured their kids would figure it out on their own. Look how well that turned out. If we want to grow the next the next generation of leftists I believe we do need to help guide them. Like, I do kinda resent the fact that I was raised to think the earth is only 6,000 years old and that evolution is a lie. But I resent it because it's false, not because my parents impressed a view on me per se, if that makes sense. What you're teaching your kid is true, and I think they will appreciate it when they're older and see how the world works, IMO.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Star Wars has anti-fascism written all over it (1-6 anyway, haven't seen the new ones) and it's geared towards kids. That makes it really sink in for kids, but for me I probably wouldn't have the left wing views that I do today if my parent wasn't always ranting about fascist pigs like Bush and Reagan, big business, imperialist wars, listening to Chomsky and Parenti lectures, bringing home the occasional Marxist agitprop like the Class Struggle boardgame (good choice if you can find it btw, it's like Monopoly but more based)

It's all a bit confusing when you're growing up so that's where I think it really pays to be consistent and also be solid on the politics/history so when they do come to you for answers you can help them by giving clear and unambiguous answers as much as possible while helping them through the anxiety and cognitive dissonance that naturally come from gradually realizing that these authority figures are not ultimately on their side, they're surrounded by nationalistic propaganda, and they live in a neoliberal-verging-on-neofascist dystopia

Just imo