this post was submitted on 03 Aug 2023
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[–] [email protected] 80 points 1 year ago (7 children)

Supposedly Alexander the Great went to visit Diogenes in a suburb of Corinth to see what his deal was. When Alexander asked if Diogenes wanted anything from him, Diogenes reported replied “yes, move, you’re blocking the sun.”

Afterwards, Alexander was so amused and impressed that he’s quoted saying “it I were not Alexander, I wish I were Diogenes.”

Fucking awesome.

[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I seem to recall Diogenes replied:

Likewise: if I were not Diogenes I too would wish I were Diogenes

I mean it's all probably made up but what a guy.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

i've been trying to figure out how to explain the spirit of the '70s to people, and i think that's exactly it.. everybody wanted to be Diogenes..

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Diogenes was the Zlatan of philosophy.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

Wasn't he in like a barrel? That he also used as a masterbatorium?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago

And apparently Diogenes said back to Alexander "if I were not Diogenes, I would also want to be Diogenes".

Legend.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Dude straight up told the most powerful man of his time to fuck off.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Diogenes didn't exactly tell him to fuck off, it was more that he made a request for him to move over as if Alexander was literally any other man on Earth. An equal. Which arguably is more insulting as I'm sure Alexander's enemies often told him to fuck off, but this was the first time he was requested to stand aside by a dude known to publically masturbate.

Later, Alexander found Diogenes picking at the bones of a long dead servant, and when Alexander inquired as to what Diogenes was doing, Diogenes replied that he was trying find the difference between these bones and the bones of Alexander's father. Zero fucks given because in the end we are all bones.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

More people should do that. Then maybe all of our rich and powerful wouldn't be such gigantic, punchable dicktwats.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

This meeting has an entire Wikipedia entry lol: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diogenes_and_Alexander

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

I only remember that story because of Reign: The Conquerer.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

What a fucking edgelord

[–] [email protected] 72 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Founder of cynicism and famously lived in a barrel. Certified based.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So just straight up Oscar the Grouch

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Oscar was actually based on a rude waiter, so pretty much the same thing.. all waiters are philosophers..

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

i was never man enough to be a waiter

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I thought he was based on homeless people so kids watching Sesame Street would have some exposure to irritable people that live on the streets.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

The only man truly capable of Getting Over It.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I feel like “lived in a barrel” is probably one of those ancient history things that got exaggerated or was a straight up lie.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

There's no real way to prove the wine barrel part but it's safe to assume he probably sheltered somewhere when it rained. Wine barrels were common and waterproof, so I would assume Diogenes watched a stray dog take shelter in an empty wine barrel and did the same based on his praise of dogs living by instinct combined with the simple practicality of finding shelter rather than making or paying for it.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Cynics saw the dog as the greatest example of a virtuous life, hence the dog in the statue.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Well, their name comes from the greek word for dog, it only makes sense for this to be alluded to in a statue of Diogenes.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

People referred to diogenes as a dog as a form of insult, but diogenes was like "YOU KNOW WHAT FUCKERS? THAT SHOE FUCKING FITS." and then he called himself "Diogenes the dog".

As you could maybe tell I may have paraphrased a bit. But who knows, I don't speak old greek. I had latin in school.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago

Everybody acting like if he existed today he wouldn't be villified for his actions

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago

One day when a few people were throwing bones at Diogenes as they would to a dog, he got up and urinated on them like a dog.

Certified savage

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Remember when base meant vulgar?

Pepperidge farm remembers.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I have no idea what it's supposed to mean now?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago

Being unapologetically genuine. Not necessarily rude, but honest with your beliefs despite what others might think.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Noone mentions Sam O'Nella Academy's introduction to Diogenes?

Well, I'm doing it then: Diogenes, the Publicly-Defecating Philosopher -- 11 million viewers can't be wrong!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s): https://piped.video/watch?v=-A3IlRATIsI&

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source, check me out at GitHub.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

You are doing the Lord's work, good sir

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

so based dude practically lived in the base_ment_

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Boo. But still upvoted because I'm still laughing over the waiter thing.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

i can take your boos, as long as there is laughter.. i am The Grouch..

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think those jokes weren't MEANT to be.

But since I also struggle sometimes with my dad jokes, here's an upvote.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

and in any case for Diogenes, a basement would have been luxurious

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I saw this earlier today and I read it as “no place to sit but his face,” because reading are hard and no smart brain

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

It's ironic that Digenes's fanboys (like the fanboys of stoicism), use his example as a model to better integrate, cope, and succeed in postmodern late-capital society.

Modeling one's self after Digenes without being homeless is like modeling oneself after Michael Jackson without being able to dance.

Digenes looks down from eternity and invites these posers to get fucking wrecked.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I think about, "behold, man" when anyone mentions Diogenes.

According to Diogenes Laërtius’ third-century Lives and Opinions of the Eminent Philosophers, Plato was applauded for his definition of man as a featherless biped, so Diogenes the Cynic “plucked the feathers from a cock, brought it to Plato’s school, and said, ‘Here is Plato’s man.’ ” When asked about the origin of his epithet, cynic deriving from the Greek word for dog, Diogenes replied that it was given to him because he “fawns upon those who give him anything and barks at those who give him nothing.”

Borrowed from: https://www.laphamsquarterly.org/animals/miscellany/plato-and-diogenes-debate-featherless-bipeds