this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2024
15 points (100.0% liked)

Trans

626 readers
27 users here now

General trans community.

Rules:

  1. Follow all blahaj.zone rules

  2. All posts must be trans-related. Other queer-related posts go to c/lgbtq.

  3. Don't post negative, depressing news articles about trans issues unless there is a call to action or a way to help.

Resources:

Best resource: https://github.com/cvyl/awesome-transgender Site with links to resources for just about anything.

Trevor Project: crisis mental health services for LGBTQ people, lots of helpful information and resources: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/

The Gender Dysphoria Bible: useful info on various aspects of gender dysphoria: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en

StainedGlassWoman: Various useful essays on trans topics: https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/

Trans resources: https://trans-resources.info/

[USA] Resources for trans people in the South: https://southernequality.org/resources/transinthesouth/#provider-map

[USA] Report discrimination: https://action.aclu.org/legal-intake/report-lgbtqhiv-discrimination

[USA] Keep track on trans legislation and news: https://www.erininthemorning.com/

[GERMANY] Bundesverband Trans: Find medical trans resources: https://www.bundesverband-trans.de/publikationen/leitfaden-fuer-behandlungssuchende/

[GERMANY] Trans DB: Insurance information (may be outdated): https://transdb.de/

[GERMANY] Deutsche Gesellschaft für Transidentität und Intersexualität: They have contact information for their advice centers and some general information for trans and intersex people. They also do activism: dgti.org

*this is a work in progress, and these resources are courtesy of users like you! if you have a resource that helped you out in your trans journey, comment below in the pinned post and I'll add here to pass it on

founded 6 months ago
MODERATORS
 

If you are thinking about harming yourself — get immediate crisis support. Connect to a crisis counselor 24/7, 365 days a year, from anywhere in the U.S via text, chat, or phone. The Trevor Project is 100% confidential and 100% free.

https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help/

top 17 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

Pretty meh so far, at least until tonight before I got off work: shortly before closing, I had an asshole come up, buy some cigarettes (I work at a gas station), and then and only then after having finished his transaction, turns to me and says, "Just so you know, there're only two genders."

I responded with, "Just so you know, I don't care." and then he flipped me the bird without even looking at me as he was walking away.

This is not the first time this has happened to me, and I try to put on a tough face to these dick-waffles, but honestly, it still hurt me and I hate how I'm emotionally vulnerable to it, even if I don't show it to them. :(

 


Edit: Hooooly SHIT. The dude just came by today and apologized for his behavior.

I accepted it gratefully and gracefully but godDAMN was I not expecting that. I am...so confused. I am happy...but confused.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It would be great to have a bag of rainbow or trans pride colored gummy candy dicks, so you can tell them to eat a dick (and have some on hand for them!)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Lol, that would cost money they don't deserve to have spent on them. X3

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Venting to the internet got you an apology from an asshole, quick, complain about not getting a raise before your luck runs out! 🤯

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

I need more money! Goddammit the rent is TOO. DAMN. HIGH.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I bet the guy wasn't sober when he did that. He probably still thinks that way -- alcohol doesn't make people lie, it makes them far too honest -- but realized the next day that the way he had acted was screwed up.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Balls, if that's the case. Still, at this point, I'll take what I can get. Lol.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

A cat girl dmed me and offered cuddles :3

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Thinking about going back to therapy because my flashbacks/anxiety attacks have been through the roof the past week. The meds I’m on have been great for my anxiety generally, I just haven’t been able to find a reliable way to shut down the prolonged adrenaline surges and the fear sweats (ew).

I feel pretty good despite all that, which is part of why I know the meds are still working; instead of spiraling when I start panicking I’m just going ‘damn this sucks’ and cuddling my cat and/or husband. Annoyingly knowing that doesn’t fix the panic!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I got blood work done and will hopefully get a referral for HRT :3

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Getting blood work done would be both terrifying and exciting for me; family medical history has numerous heritable issues and I'm not sure I want to find out if I've got some. History of diabetes and a VERY wide variety of heart and blood pressure issues, sleep apnea, degenerative joint and muscle issues, etc

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

I joined a dancing class!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (2 children)

How have other transfems come out or explore their femininity more openly when they don't look remotely feminine? I've been on HRT for 7 months or so, and I just don't look feminine. I look a little more feminine than I did, but still not enough to be even close to looking natural or comfortable in feminine expression. It just... doesn't look right. And that makes me feel weird which makes it look even worse.

I don't want to come out to people, telling them that I feel like a woman, when I look and sound like a man. And it's starting to limit me in doing feminine things that I need to do to look more feminine so it's circular, I'm too insecure to book a hair or nail appointment because I look like a man. I hate all of it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I've told some friends and have started trying a more fem voice when playing with them in discord. Been growing my hair out and trying more fem dressing styles, but still look pretty masc I think. I can never get a shave close enough you can't see stubble. Been wearing a trans flag pin out and about!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Stubble suuuucks! And for body hair there's that midway point where it's like a quarter inch long and STABBY!!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I don’t want to come out to people, telling them that I feel like a woman, when I look and sound like a man.

I understand where that comes from, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't think the same way when I started transitioning. I pretty much never corrected people when they misgendered me, because I didn't want to get in their way. I felt as if I hadn't earned being a woman yet. Now I understand that gender isn't something you earn. You deserve being treated for who you are, despite how you look or sound like.

I’ve been on HRT for 7 months or so, and I just don’t look feminine.

HRT is basically puberty 2.0, and puberty takes many, many years to complete. I know how frustrating it is to wait for the changes, but that should also give you hope. Even if you don't like how you look now, that can and probably will change over the years.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Thank you for this, your support really helped.