I fall asleep when my exhaustion overwhelms my anxiety; I get up when my anxiety overwhelms my exhaustion.
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Yeah, I get that. When I have a lot going on at work I end up not sleeping bcz of the anxiety, which just makes things worse.
Step 1: Go to bed at 22:00
Step 2: ?????
Step 3: Fall asleep at 04:00
Hmm, yes, I think I see how that could happen. Anytime I'm stressed out that happens. And right now, I'm not stressed out, just messed uo my sleep schedule a bit, doing a less drastic version of that.
- 6-8 hours before bed: no more coffee
- 3 hours before bed: no more eating
- 1-2 hours before bed: shower + hot bath
- until bed: low light (not blue light). No more non-fiction (no news, no work-related, etc.) and no games. Basically, nothing to get the mind/body worked up.
- bed. No screens or lights. Light music or white noise if needed.
This works pretty well for me, but sticking to it 100% of the time can be a bit difficult.
Add: Get the room as cool as possible. Feet and hands are great radiators.
Drugs
Edit: to clarify, I mean prescription stuff. But whatever floats your boat
I use melatonin, but that usually gives me insomnia after a while when I try to not use it.
Melatonin is probably one of the most misunderstood and misused supplements out there
Care to elaborate? I agree it's certainly overused. I know I use it wayy to much.
Melatonin doesn’t make you tired. It can impact how your body regulates itself but in and of itself it isn’t a sedative.
I use that, but if something disturbs my sleep, like my partner arriving at 2am after work, having taken melatonin will disrupt the rest of my night.
Beat me to it. Was going to post an alcohol bottle.
Same. Except mine aren't prescription. Technically, it's OTC.
I'm still baffled by it, but a couple of years ago I found a switch in my brain and now I rarely have issues falling asleep anymore. I think the most important thing for me is not to constantly ask myself why I'm failing at such a seemingly simple task, but rather work around my natural instincts and try to support them as best I can.
If I go to bed early, because I have to get up early, I start spiralling and fall asleep way later, so I try to only go to bed whenever I'm tired. If I end up sleping too little I take one or two 20 minute naps (I try to never exceed 20, it would make me even more tired).
Another factor is probably how long I sleep. I always assumed I wanted to sleep long, because getting up sucks. But at some point I realised, that my first 'sorta-awake' moment is the perfect moment to get up and have energy for the day and get tired at the proper time. This moment comes at around 6 hours for me. I still struggle with this a lot though.
That "sorta wakeup" moment is what apps like Sleep As Android take advantage of. It recognizes based on motion(?) that you've reached a specific sleep phase and wakes you then.
That's awesome! I'm happy for you :)
Getting to bed with my wife. Laying with dimmed lights for a while and then pretending to sleep together. Whenever my wife is not home and I sleep alone I tend to prolong my time on phone and then have difficulty falling asleep.
Ohh that's a good one. Maybe I'll try that.
We're going to need a big bed if we all try to sleep with his wife together 🤔
Made me chuckle, I meant my wife, haha.
An hour of exercise about 5 hours earlier
This is a good one. I always struggle to keep an exercise routine going.
Honestly? Ritalin
Since I started taking it I'm way more tired in the evening and don't struggle to fall asleep 🤷
My personal theory is that stimulants can help your brain stop working in overdrive and focus on one thing and, while they don't make me sleepy per se, it helps me fall asleep. But it doesn't always work and can also disrupt my sleep.
It's more that when they work during the day they get me tired in the evening, but yeah when they are taking effect I can easily take a nap too lol
I haven't had a lot of luck with adhd meds. I'm really sensitive to meds unfortunately.
Awh sorry to hear that, hope you found ways to cope with it ♥️
I lie to myself by saying, "I can stay awake for one more episode" before eventually falling asleep on the couch sometime in the next 10 minutes. Then, approximately 3-4 hours later, I'll wake up, take my evening medications, brush my teeth, prepare for and then go to bed so I can lay there awake for the next hour or two trying to fall back asleep. Eventually, I'll dose off and get a few more hours of sleep, although never achieving the quality or depth of sleep I obtain while passed out on the couch.
Toss off
- Smart lights throughout the house. Mine very gradually dim off in the evening, simulating sunset, which helps convince my body to crawl into bed. They also gradually dim on in the mornings, which helps ease me into being awake. When my routines are strong, I'm often up and out of bed before my alarm (and before sunrise).
- Exercise. I find that working out first thing in the morning works best for me, but my friend does better with evening workouts. Consistency is much more important than time of day, but maybe don't expect to fall asleep immediately after working out.
- Sleep cycles. A typical sleep cycle is roughly 90 minutes, so aiming for a bedtime that gives you a multiple of 90 minutes total sleep time can make the waking up part easier. I used to use the Sleep ad Android app for my alarm because it could try to detect your sleep cycles and would wake you up early if it meant waking you up in the ideal sleep phase.
- Don't sleep in. I know it's a real tough one, but if you can force yourself to get up on a consistent schedule, you're more likely to be actually tired on schedule also. This one is especially challenging to stick to if you want to get up early on weekdays, but stay up late on weekends. Naps may help here, but it can take some practice to find what works.
- Bed is for sleep (and sex) only. Don't hang out in bed, and if you're having a lot of trouble falling asleep, get out of bed for a while until you're feeling more tired. This helps your brain form a stronger association where bed = sleep.
- Avoid caffeine, alcohol, marijuana, etc., before bed. While some of these may help you fall asleep, they often result in lower quality sleep and may make it more likely that you wake up.
- Limit fluid intake before bed so that you don't wake up in the middle of the night to pee. *Routine. I think I kinda loosely touched on this in a few other points, but sticking to a consistent routine makes it so much easier to fall asleep and wake up.
Oh, and if your responsibilities and/or latitude have you regularly trying to sleep during daylight hours, definitely get a sleep mask and/or some good blackout curtains so you can block out the light. Ear plugs may also be helpful if noise is an issue.
I like the smart lights idea. If I owned my house I'd see about doing that.
I've used them in a few rentals. There's a wide variety of options available that are just bulbs + an app, or bulbs & a hub + an app, so unless you have some unusual fixtures, they can be used anywhere.
In fact, my last apartment had an unusual fixture: an overhead fixture that had hardwired LEDs in it, rather than any sort of swappable bulb, so I found a cheap overhead fixture that fit standard E26 bulbs, and just swapped the fixtures for the duration of my stay, then switched them back when I moved out. As long as you can ensure the power to the fixture is off at the breaker, it should be a pretty simple swap.
Recently my wife and I both tried and can confirm that taking Calm (check Amazon) 1 hour before bed allows us not only to fall asleep easily, but felt like we slept well. No I don't work for them.
Also don't drink anything with caffeine in it past 3pm.
What is Calm? All I can find is the meditation app.
Powdered Magnesium supplement.
I use an app called insight timer. It has guided meditations. I hated the idea, and I still hate the idea, but it works. There are a bunch of different types, so you can look around to find one that works for you. I'm sure you can find the same things on YouTube or whatever, but this collecta them all into one place.
Guided meditation does work for me when I'm not super stressed from work. I should get into it again.
I used to take a double-shot of Nyquil before when I should be going to bed just so I could get to sleep at a decent time.
omg, I was doing that when I got sick a few weeks ago, and I realized I was going to bed at a normal time no matter what I was doing. Did it once after I was better. Definitely not a great habit.
2 hours before: Dim the lights and huff some melatonin
2 - 1 hour: Get in bed and read a book. Maybe some more melatonin
Then fall asleep
I don't use my phone or any electronics and try not to talk too much with my roommates during that time. I also found that if I take ritalin or drink coffee less than like 8 hours before sleep, that I have more trouble falling asleep.
Obviously your mileage may (and will) vary