this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2024
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[–] [email protected] 85 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

We (30-40yo guys) just played soccer, and there were too few of us. So we invited some kids who were hanging around on the fields. Well, fuck...
(The ball flies away)
Kid: I'll bring it back! (sprints after the ball like I'm not sprinting during the attack, then proceeds to run like that for the next hour)
We were only better like a pickup truck is better when it collides with a motorcycle

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

There is a reason endurance athletes skew older while performance athletes skew younger

[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

I like the little 30 min - 1hr naps I get on the weekend after taking adderall

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 month ago (3 children)

That's why I switched to boofing methamphetamine.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Nap tag: when you get tagged out, you have to take a nap. Kids will run from it and parents will happily lose.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Don’t gatekeep shoving drugs up your asshole.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

[What gate?](goatse.cx)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Would you also take gifts from wealthy people? If yes, congratulations, you are now qualified to serve on the Supreme Court.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hah! Wrong!

I don't need coffee to give me energy - at this point I need it to just manage basic consciousness.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (2 children)

It's literally how coffee (caffeine) works. You build immunity to it super fast (about a week) so you need your normal dose to feel just normal.

Good news is that you can withdraw just as quick if you want, and afterwards coffee goes back to giving you a kick of energy. Unless you drink it daily, then back to square one.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

I will happily settle for "barely conscious" if it means I get to have coffee every day.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

I save caffeine for the weekends and always thought it made me feel awesome. Now I know why.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Hey! I can still throw 30lbs around for an hour just fine! ... I just happen to weigh a lot more than that as an adult.

Similar to why kids appear to be made of rubber. Not only are they literally more flexible, but a kid running in to a wall has a LOT less energy than an adult plowing in to it. That energy difference has to come from effort.

To go the same speed, adults quite literally have to use a shitload more energy.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Coffee as a stimulate does nothing for me. I have ADHD and it acts like a suppressant instead. But, beyond the addiction I’ve grown accustomed to having for it, I also enjoy the ritual of spending the first hour or two of my morning (at least on weekends) sitting with my coffee and catching up on current memes and events.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Coffee time is the best meme time.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Having coffee is kinda mandatory to be able to poop somewhat regularly. Besides that all other effects are mostly moot for me. Except that sometimes it makes my heart race in bad ways.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

I just like the taste of good coffee. I have to limit myself to one of two cups a day and I'd be shaking I bet.

Most folks don't really try expensive specialty beans or move beyond drip coffee. If most decaffeinated coffee wasn't garbage I'd switch out at least carry both.

I know this is pretentious, I still think it's true.

I recently had a light roast fermented with a mix of citrus fruit. The result was almost like a really fully bodied tea with hints on citrus. Low acid and bitterness. But it costs $35/12oz and is limited batch which is way more than most want to deal with.

Decent espresso starts at like $600 buy in so they can't experiment that route either.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I will forever advocate good coffee methods. An electric kettle and a French press or Clever dripper will always taste better than a Mr. Coffee pot dripper. Even with less than great coffee brands/grounds.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Oh, definitely. I have an electric moka pot in the office, and the coffee it makes is miles better than that weird paper disk coffee machine the company bought.

That being said, it is less forgiving on poor roasts than a French press, but I've had good results with Cameron's Hawaiian blend and Aerial Resupply's MOAB robusta.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Eh, I've read that caffeine is healthy to consume. Bottoms up!

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 month ago

I'm pretty sure being Shakey is still to much lol

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

At this point coffee in me is like oil in a car.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Yeah. It's not about having energy. At this point it's about just being functional. At best.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

My grandma was the same. Made me never touch coffee because she was scary before her morning coffee and I never wanted to become like that

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

i barely even want to be functional in the first place, please don't make me.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

There are days I need a coffee just to have enough energy to make myself a coffee. Those days suck.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I do cold brew so I get everything done the night before.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Sometimes I tend to leave my morning coffee barely touched as I rush to work, and it's always such a lovely surprise when I get home. Hot coffee is great. Cold coffee is refreshing. Lukewarm coffee is one of the foulest substances known to man.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

honestly once I quit caffeine the energy started to just be there on its own again.