this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2024
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chapotraphouse

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It's an app like Grindr but also for straight people and it only works between 11 and 2 in the middle of the day Monday through Friday. It is used exclusively for finding someone to hook up with during your tech bro flexible hours extended lunch break.

I think this would unironically be successful and also would unironically remove so much fake tech bro productivity from capitalism that I almost want to do it. I could make millions and get the world to extend the lunch hour to a lunch hour and a half so folks still had time to eat during their lunch and lay break. This would extend down to other non tech bro industries and would be a workplace hours revolution.

The name is a pun on lunch and learn, the tech bro's favorite activity.

This is a terrible idea.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Omg you could call it Lunch Laydy

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This is the premium subscription name. $5.99 a month until it gets big and then we jack that price up to $30.99 once we have the tech bro hookup market cornered

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

You gotta wait to jack the price up after you sell off to another company that promised not to ruin it but then adds micro-transactions, and other gamification/enshitification. Looking at you Fleksy keyboard.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I think there would be a bit of a gender ratio issue lol

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Not if we pair up the tech bros with each other

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

That seems like a great idea until I remember Peter Thielobama-sad

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Why would anyone want to have sex when that time could be spent programming instead. I don't understand.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You know how Bumble has like Bumble BFF? We'll launch a companion app called Paired Programming where you just go work over lunch together

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Actually kind of need this lol. I don't have anyone to talk to when the site I am working on shits the bed.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

I think this would unironically be successful

It'd need a more bazinga name that continues the tiresome trend that Steve Jobs started and be lower case and probably fashionably misspelled.

laynch or something like that. I'd need to do more bazinga-appropriated drugs to come up with more.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

Ok, that's pretty good che-smile

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

You could make a version aimed at libs called brunch and bang.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

This one has potential.

BangBrunch?

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It's an app like Grindr but also for straight people

Predicting right now that the proportion of users that are men will be the same for both apps

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

My friend recommended me a dating app but so far it's like 10:1 men. To be fair though I see about as many men that I'm actually attracted to as I do women and enbies.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

DO IT DO IT DO IT

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

The thought of trying to have sex with a rando on a hookup app with a sloshy ramen belly full of noodles, lol.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Imagine the Le Epic Soylent fart powder experience. kombucha-disgust

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

Sex first, ramen after.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

It is used exclusively for finding someone to hook up with during your tech bro flexible hours extended lunch break.

The challenge for this app would be to find sufficient consenting feeemale app users for its own internal ecosystem, I think.

The top-tier way bazingas "lunch and lay" is more like this: (CW: SV, drugged coercion, mind control experiements)

https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/01/brotopia-silicon-valley-secretive-orgiastic-inner-sanctum

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

The Match Group wants to know your location

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Rendéz-screw