this post was submitted on 15 Dec 2024
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And Finally...
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Oh that's good parenting.
Pupils at Lee-on-the-Solent Junior School began to sob as he told them that Father Christmas was not real
Which is a bit rich coming from someone who has devoted their life to a magic sky wizard, who has a lot less evidence supporting his existence compared to Santa and, yet, he's caused a lot more misery and death.
The OG St Nicholas was pretty cool at least.
You got to love a douche canoe who's made his entire career about paying lip service to an imaginary being going off on a tangent to a bunch of children telling them not to believe in a an imaginary being that brings them joy.
Blind faith in anything is a mental illness.
I guess he would know about imaginary friends ...
How did you find out he wasn't really?
My Dad agreed to be Santa at my nursery but the wellies they have him were too small, so he wore his own shoes. I spotted this and freaked out, thinking the weird old man with a white beard was some kind of murder hobo who'd killed my father and stolen his shoes. My folks had to tell me the truth to calm me down.
I found out when I was seven when my parents had to explain why we weren't gonna get presents this year.
Poverty, mostly, but also my family didn't actually celebrate Christmas, the children just decided we were because of all the christmas media they throw around at the time of year.
I found pictures of my brother's inlaw jumping on the trampoline Santa brought me that had the date 24th of December.
I took the photographic evidence, became a little cop and got them to confess, they tried to tell me the dates were wrong on the camera, but the photos of me on Christmas morning were correct, that lie didn't last long.
Holy shit
Leave it to the church to make people unhappy. Let's make those churches into homes for the homeless, at least they would be useful.
At least they were telling kids the truth for once!
That a child was born from a virgin mother due to a jealous god impregnating her?
Could be true I suppose. Bit of a dick move if you ask me. Also kind of breaks the "do not covet your neighbors wife" thing if she was already married to Joseph.. can't remember the order there.
We asked my parents if Santa was real, and they said "what do you think?" We said no, and they said you're right.
I think it's crazy that parents think it's a good idea to tell their kids a lie that if true would fundamentally change their understanding of the world. "Hey kid, I'm probably the person you most trust in the world. How about I tell you a real whopper?"
Religions
I agree, but parents believe the religion too, whereas they know Santa isn't real.
This is why anyone affiliated with religion of any kind shouldn't be allowed near a school at all. My kids would've been kept home that day for sure.
Nothing reaffirms Jesus' message more than making children sob. It's what he would have wanted.
How did you find out he wasn’t really?
I just did a lot of soul searching and asking prying questions to the religious educators at my school etc. It all started to fall apart under scrutiny.
Oh wait, Santa? My parents just told me when I was 7 or 8.
My spouse and I opted not to tell our kid last year, with me not wanting to be the one to spoil it and her wanting to keep the magic "just one more year."
This year was already too late. The kid got into an argument at school about whether or not Santa was real.
My spouse and I planned it all out, planned on going out to get a hot cocoa, etc., etc. Instead my kid sat ME down and said they wanted to ask me something. So I got stuck telling answering that Santa wasn't real, but spun it that it was about learning to give without getting, and ended up pulling out Death's SPEECH from Hogsfather about believing in big lies.
The kid mostly cared that they'd still get presents, so it was a bust.
in some ways though the pragmatism of how kids learn and interact with the world, their parents and hold their own emergency discussion summit is pretty endearing and heart-warming
I'm the youngest of 4 and my older siblings are assholes.
It's better that way. Kids need to learn early that authority figures use lies to maintain order and control, that the rest of us should educate each other, and that Christmas is 90% capitalism and 10% everything else.
Ok, let me explain the evils of capitalism to my 6 year old self.
Nope....I just called myself a poopy head.
Capitalistic Christmas began even before Edward Bernays got consumerism rolling.
"Smell that? What's that smell?"
"Opportunity."
"No. Money!"
My made up shit is realer than your made up shit!
My best friend in the third grade went shopping with her mom and later saw something they bought in her brother’s Easter basket. She told me about her suspicions and it wasn’t hard to make the leap to Santa too.
miracle on 34th street reference?
10 and 11 year olds still believe in Santa? Idiots.