this post was submitted on 04 Jan 2024
576 points (99.8% liked)

Risa

6943 readers
7 users here now

Star Trek memes and shitposts

Come on'n get your jamaharon on! There are no real rules—just don't break the weather control network.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 46 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 34 points 11 months ago (1 children)

At least he still outranks Ensign Kim.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It's easier to list whatever harry out ranks, which I think is a stembolt on an upper pylon on Empok Nor.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)

We're working on promoting that Stem Bolt. It recently got an excellent recommendation from Admiral Janeway.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago

Cleaning *** out of the Holodeck's *** filters

[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (1 children)

NIGHT CREW!

Don’t forget to use Pledge on the railing!

[–] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I would be super dissapointed to learn that they figured out FTL travel and the ability to simply materialise food and all the other amazing technological feats but still hadn't automated cleaning yet. I godamn hate cleaning.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Data is just a future Roomba.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

Ah so that’s why he wanted to make a kid, offload the chores

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Vacuum machines starts whirling really loud ... rumbles ... starts smoking ... shuts down

Tears apart the unit and discovers six Captains com badges in the hose

Yes we're looking at you @[email protected]

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

My ready room has a supply closet full of extra badges, because I won't use the ones that have touched the floor.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Worf stepping on another one of the captain's badges.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

In this context, Picard looks so pleased like he planned it.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

Is this from a blooper? Worf looks like he's holding in a smile.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

At least they're not in charge of cleaning out the holodeck, that place has to be pretty rough

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Especially after Dr. T’Ana and Shax gets through with it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Someone wrote log entries for the holodeck technician like 20 years ago... They were quite funny. Can't remember where I saw them.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

Couldn't they just clean the ship using the transporters and air filtration

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago

Not enough suffering, eh?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It’s all the dead skin cells and hair that we shed.

[–] GregorGizeh 9 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Do a daily transporter sweep for dead organic material all over the ship to purge all those skin cells and hairs and other leftovers of our existing. No more vac

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago (2 children)

And then everyone wakes up freshly peeled. It's a win-win!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Just avoid areas with life signs. Person in the room? Delay the transporter sweep for an hour and check again. Or alternatively just don't clear dead skin cells/hair/dust within a 2ft radius of a given life sign, and do maybe 3 sweeps a day.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

And bald. And fingernail-less.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

And then someone forgets to reset the buffer after a difficult transport and then suddenly there's 30 new Tuvixes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

And then it goes into the source matter for the food replicators.

[–] GregorGizeh 1 points 11 months ago

The circle of life 🥰

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

And his needs are met. He's got a place to live. He's got replicators.

I'd vacuum every damned deck if it gave me a place on a starship where all my needs were met.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

100%. I have a nice cushy work from home desk job right now but I've also worked service jobs and manual labor jobs and I would absolutely jump at the chance for a job as janitorial staff on a starship exploring the galaxy for nothing more than accommodations and the amenities of replicators and holodecks aboard said starship exploring the galaxy. Space shitter clogged? I'm all over it for a chance to just be out there with my needs met.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Left someone out.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This is just like the US Navy. Junior enlisted clean constantly.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Swab the deck ye matey

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Don't they have the DOTS robots for this?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Thanks for reminding me of yet another reason why Star Trek: Discovery is not canon.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Given that they have the ability to select pretty much whatever material they want with the transporters, I imagine it wouldn't be too hard for them to do a once a day transport for all dust/debris particles directly into space, or some containment unit of their choosing. Same goes for pretty much any other cleaning task.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It is mentioned in that one episode where they have a small village of “back to the land” type people staying in the cargo bay, along with their farm animals that they don’t have to keep sweeping up all the time, the bays will clean themselves. They just have to stop lighting cooking fires.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

That actually makes me think, would it theoretically be possible to automate ship repair with transporter technology? All the time they have ships coming in with giant chunks missing.

If you are able to get a high resolution scan of the current state of the vessel, and have the plans to build it, couldn't they set up a specialized transporter to transport the damaged bits away, and transition area that is destroyed, and then replace it with new parts as needed?

Basically do some a similar repair method from Space Engineers, just fancier with transporters.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Is that the Paramount set or is that Star Trek The Experience? A lot of the proportions seem off.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

At the very least, the headrests are wrong and the carpet is the wrong color*. Probably the latter.

(* maybe it looks "right" on those novelty VHS recordings you get at the end of the experience?)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This reminds me of the old web series Space Janitors.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

I had never heard of this show before but it looks hilarious. https://youtu.be/VPhq2sudOi8?si=PXCNxk96-rMSAKnZ