this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2024
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For me, maybe petrol.

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[–] [email protected] 42 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Joke's on you. I've been slowly building up an immunity to iocaine powder for years.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Clearly, you have a dizzying intellect.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago (2 children)

So I obviously cannot choose the wine in front of me.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

You're just stalling now.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

inconceivable!

[–] [email protected] 35 points 9 months ago (4 children)

A glass of mercury, it looks like it tastes delicious.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Sooo elemental mercury. Not absorbed well in the GI tract. I had a patient who took time cracking open thermometers from boilers for a while and then attempted to drink it mixed with some coffee to commit suicide. We show up since he called 911 and now wanted to go to the hospital. Call poison control for recommendations for local hospitals since this isn't common and i don't know what hospitals can handle this thing. Poison control cites that it isn't well absorbed, if at all, in the GI tract. I was pretty surprised.

So really you could drink it and find out the taste with very small if any repercussions.

Ya know, just saying.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Didn't uh.. something like Lewis and Clarke..

Didn't they use mercury based laxatives, and that was used to track their path?

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/how-reconstruct-lewis-and-clark-journey-follow-mercury-laden-latrine-pits-180956518/

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Should have used an everlasting pill if they didn't want to be tracked by their poop.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

a single pill would serve a whole family during their lives

"Hey Dad, can I get the everlasting pill when you're done with it?"

"Check back in a few hours."

🤢

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

Yeah elemental mercury ain't that bad. It's all those organic compounds of mercury that are the baddies.

And.... you know, shiny poops that hit the bottom of the bowl with a THUNK , that would be something different. You'd literally lose a few pounds every time you went to the toilet.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I’m curious how it feels to drink something that heavy

[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago

I imagine afterwards you'd just sit and reflect.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Seems like it would sit pretty heavy, though...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Nah, it goes down real smooth.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Cody's lab has entered the chat

[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Sitting down with a good movie and a bowl of tide pods.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You might be happy to know, my mouth literally dropped open when I read your comment 😂

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I mean... alcohol? You can already buy it easily prepared in all sorts of delicious ways.

Am I not in the spirit of the thing?

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I want to lick The Elephant's Foot.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

This is an interesting one!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Does lava count as poisonous

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago (1 children)

By the power granted to me by no one in particular:

I'll allow it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

How about uranium? It's called radiation poisoning...

Also do I have to procure it first?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

1 gram of uranium has about 20 billion calories so while you might not die, you're gonna get fat super fast.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)

8 kilos of molten gold.

  1. ???

  2. Profit

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

Nobody said you wouldn't have to pay for it ; ).

[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I would see what the big deal with heroine is

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Heroin*

Heroine is the feminine form of hero

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

He said what he said!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

If you don't experience any of the reprocussions, would it even do anything?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

You would probably get high but have the incredibly painful withdrawal symptoms.

Granted, the euphoria alone would probably incentivize you to try it again anyway, so I still wouldn't

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

Fugu. I’m far too much of a coward to try it normally.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago

One of those poisonous dart frogs

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Red paint. No. Blue paint. Which ever one smells better.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I heard some poisonous mushrooms are very tasty...

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago (2 children)

The fly agaric mushroom. I wanna see if it makes me taller.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

You can eat those if you prepare them correctly. Prepare for a cozy experience if you dose it right. shroomery

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Specifically weapons-grade plutonium, enough to make a nuclear bomb. I get to keep it afterwards, right?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago

Lead. It used to be used for flavor.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Four Loko, the official drink of poor decisions.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Sodium! Looks so soft and fun, melts in your mouth!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

My worst enemy. I get a full stomach and less of a nuisance to worry about.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

I bet hemlock is delicious.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

New bars of soap always looked tasty to me.

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