this post was submitted on 07 Nov 2024
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chapotraphouse

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Hiya! Your friendly neighborhood corgi checking in on you again! Been a while since we've had one of these. Figured with the election and all, might as well, plus I don't have any work yet today so fuck it, check on my friends!

For the new folks, welcome! I do these from time to time just to give people a space to vent and unwind, or tell us abotu anything exciting you've got going on.

For my own part, band stuff is coming along nicely! Did a gig with a friends band last Friday that went well, our second show with a 2nd guitarist. Writing and recording, new tracks should be out by the spring. Also posted a video of the show here a few days ago. Beyond that, work has been....eh. Still looking for a full time thing, its been 14 months now. AI training has me on a few new projects, but the work is coming in slow. Had to split rent into 2 payments this month and I was able to get the first sent out, but still worried about settling up the rest next week.

Beyond that, not much else going on. One year with no booze this month, so fuck yeah for that.

Hope you're well, and remember you are loved stalin-heart

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[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

politically i feel fucking high, like, this is the type of week that reminds me why i follow politics (in a jokerfied way). i'm not inside the great satan so really this only affects me through watching libs become disillusioned on the internet. the despair in me says that somehow none of these will stick and nobody's getting radicalized, but the meltdown is fun at least. plus, usamerican will be be more likely to give a shit about the world for a few years and trump's admin might get us closer to peace in ukraine (which is a lot more relevant to my area lol)

but on the personal side of things, i continue to be fucking useless. this job won't hold out for another year and i'm desperately trying to apply to PhDs to actually do some good in the world, but my god i'm awful without a clear, set deadline, which these don't have. i've always done everything the night before it was due and now i'm looking at blank pages and just... not filling them. for night after night i do NOTHING. i don't even play video games or sew or do the things i actually enjoy, i just have to sit around despairing that i'm not doing what i need to and want to. people have been telling me to get adhd tested for a literal decade, and this is the first time i kind of regret not listening (a guy at work says he knows someone who could sell me some adderal, but thats Very Illegal here and also idk....). personally i don't think i'm adhd, i'm pretty sure i'm just a lazy bastard who's never had to try academically, but still, any advantage might be nice ๐Ÿ™ƒ

plus, i've now learnt that doing anything (like getting into a phd) when you have a dayjob SUCKS. my job is a scam tbh but even so, my noctural ass is having mad trouble staying up past midnight, and turning to energy drinks to fix it seems like its me immune to energy drinks. it just feel like theres infinitely less time in the day kitty-birthday-sad

thanks for giving us somewhere to say this sort of shit and reminding us to take a minute to contemplate, comrade corgi Care-Comrade doggo-matapacos