Data is Beautiful

Out of curiosity, why the refusal to use online dating?

Don't forget rule #1: be attractive, or rule #2: don't be unattractive

Online dating is shit for everyone

-a trans lesbian

Thanks to Tinder I had the best and the worst first dates in my life.

But both long term girlfriends and soon-to-be-my-wife I met through friends

this power imbalance is bad for everyone as well, if you meet up with someone via these (if are not male presenting), there is a concerningly high chance that you get sexually assaulted, I am terrified how common this seems to be among the women I've talked to

This is partly because the apps suck (because of capitalism/profit motive) and partly because we all suck.

Many people of all genders won't do better than "hey". And then complain that they're not having good experiences. Sometimes it's garbage in, garbage out, my dudes.

I also get a lot of weird dead ends. Their profile will be like "I love elden ring". You'll be like "elden ring is a masterpiece! Did you play the new expansion yet?" They'll be like "no". End of messages. My dude. That's not how this works. In real life, fine, maybe you can give a short answer and see what they do, read some body language. But in an asynchronous text only communication? That's not pulling your weight. And if you're not actually interested, just unmatch. If you don't have time , don't reply at all. It's async. Come back later.

Maybe some of these people match with each other and are very happy with "what's up?" "nm u?" "Im good" forever.

All my friends are people I have known for 10+ years and mostly met through school.

And due to urban sprawl, everyone gets into their car in their garage, drives to work, then drives back to their garage. There's no room for walking to the neighborhood pub, convenience store, pharmacy, etc and bumping into neighbors on the way.

You don't know me!

Grandpa was trolling DARPAnet for skanks.

BBS'es and Fidonet through modem were there before the web.

Don't think many found each other on BBS's but at least they could download low res porn.

DoD nerds be fuckin'.

University hosted BBS in 1989 here.

It's a survey, so it relies on the surveyed to tell accurately the date they meet and how, so I won't be surprised that the line here is incorrect.

Or maybe they refer to using classified ads in the newspaper or over of those "romantic meeting agency" (I don't know the name in English, in French it is agence de rencontre) that existed back in the day

There was an almost overnight shift from "ewww, online people are weird strangers" to "the Internet is just digital real life". For years it was the first, and then as mainstream popularity hit, it was like a switch flipped and suddenly the Internet was "cool" and just like comics and superheros, everyone acted like they were a fan all along.

It was kinda jarring tbh. All the things that got you labeled a nerd and a geek(negatively) were suddenly good things. I think it mostly had to do with the tech surge and people seeing it as a valuable thing now.

Tinder launched in 2012. eHarmony and Match.com were pretty fringe sites but Tinder commodified and gamified the mechanics. That made online dating “fun”. Also we saw a huge growth in smart phones in 2010 to 2012

Tinder launches in 2012.

Is it possible some people reported both an online relationship and another method in the same year?

its so high up in the graph that it isnt even visible

"She was turning tricks on the street. I was one of her regulars. After awhile she said she didn't want to charge me anymore, so here we are."

Luckily, my wife and I met in high school, so she doesn't have to rely on me for a cover story.

It already dwarfed every other statistic before 2020, but sure, the last little bit was covid