this post was submitted on 24 Jun 2024

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chapotraphouse

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New job dropped: Royal horse psychologist (hexbear.net)

submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Wow even the horses are killers.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Plural of horse is horsies. Anyway i can fix him

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

Better. I'd rather see the animals get rehabilitated and the royalty get got.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I have some bad news for anyone picturing a horse psychologist

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Been rewatching BJ, I’m at this point in the series again. Funny you would post this. I breathed a little harder out of my nose when I saw it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

😤

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

Jesus even the horse is a goddamn anglo... Well sorry, no exceptions :xi-gun:

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

damn, even the horse has the same anglo brainworms

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

The psyche of an entire nation rests on the shoulders of inbred monarchs who do nothing except have weddings, diddle children, and wear heavy jewelry that depresses their skulls

[+] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (4 children)

[removed by mod]

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Revisionist hands wrote this post

Pigeons are so cute killing them is wrong

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Then I'm no homie of you. Pidgeons are good cute birds we abandoned. If you don't find their coos adorable then I don't know what to say

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Counterpoint: BIG pigeon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVMTEExp2_s

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sorry Egon but we love pidgeons around here.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm Shale-pilled

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

hate that i understood this reference, it's been 15 years!!! negative

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Shale is great. I love that they decided to make the big burly murdergolem a woman dwarf.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Had to kinda stop using her after a while, with the right crystals she could solo entire maps of darkspawn marx-ok

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Heavy weapons warrior goes chippity chop chop chop

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My best team ever was my waif of an elf and Sten both going: "chippity choppity your head is now my property" with massive honking swords sicko-lea

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I played thru the game for the first time in years last month, and I ended running exactly the same load out, including waifish elf. I had Wynne on as control/healer and then Zevran as rogue. Sometimes I swapped sten for Alistair if I needed a tank.

I really wanted to run with Morrigan, but I kinda hated her. Felt like they had a different team writing her camp and her world dialogue.

Morrigan in camp: "Hey have you considered your customs might not be universal, and whats odd to you actually has rationality?"
Morrigan in the world: "hey I noticed you didn't want to murder a bunch of mages. Have you considered they're weak and they should all fucking die?"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

she is a fucking wild one for sure. Sten was always interesting because to my knowledge he is the only companion in any RPG who hates it if you try to kiss his ass, as in if you disagree you can CONVINCE him to your thinking instead of having to agree with him and then move on to get those approval points

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Yeah I love Sten, he's kind of autistic representation in a way. He doesn't understand social cues at all, but he's great you just gotta get over yourself and not get offended when he asks you things in a blunt fashion.
He's like one of the only characters who has strong opinions, but is willing to change them.

Morrigan is weird because when you meet her she's chill if you just treat her like a person and respect her boundaries, which makes me go "oh so it's just about not being prejudiced about apostates and things that strike me as weird. She's welcoming and open-minded" but then she'll just go full-on colonizer "kill the inferior beings" whenever you meet anyone that isnt like her.
And then she asks to birth an eldritch god.

Did you do dalish or alienage elf?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

alienage

this one was my heavy armour gal

dalish

i did this one too but she was a boring archer

judging by how Morrigan has been treated during the whole series she was a writer's pet project, it might as well be canon that she has the baby. this might be a hot take but i dont think bioware should continue to do the "your choices totally matter!" thing, when it's very clear that they cant put the actual effort into it due to money most likely

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah I thought Morrigan was some sort of promotional thing or a character from a previous game, just because of her design and questline. Like all the other characters are not as intricate as her and they don't get to have a cool bossbattle as their capstone. She even gets to hang out gloomily in the corner of the camp like some sort of outdoorsy variant of "cool guy in an inn".
But as far as I can tell, she was just another character for the roster.

Sucks how boring archery is.

Yeah the "your choices matter" really doesn't work for a game spanning decades and geopolitical movements. It kinda worked for mass effect because it's so character driven, but with Dragon Age its just not viable and actually just makes your choices feel less important. "Oh you made Alistair king? We'll have a little cutscene, there you go. No templars still suck. Oh you made the elves an accepted part of Ferelden? Sike no you didn't."

I do love origins though. My favourite dilemma is the dwarf quest. Do I go with the "good guy" who wants the best, but is ineffective, or do I go with the corrupt scumfuck tyrant who is able to save the dwarves?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

The problem with choices mattering is the fact that under capitalism there's no way they can justify creating storylines that involve a lot of those characters anyway. The Krogan genophage cure in ME3 is a massive outlier and honestly shocks me that they got a green light to do it. There's a reason usually the guy from previous game who could've died is just going to show up in a tavern and he's like "Yeah, you wanna get drunk for old times?" or if they want to be REAL cheap in an email.

Loved the dwarves tbh, my first character was a dwarf noble and it was a really easy jump into an evil playthrough

Being an archer was just being a discount mage with less cool shit to do, it was really easy to snipe mages though thinking-about-it

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

That kid riding the horse looks like he’s 14 and just found the costume closet in school

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

What did they think would happen after they showed the horse the entire Predator franchise?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Even the horses are bastards in the British royal family

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

least evil angloid