Ask Lemmy

Pretty shit. Came out of the closet as trans to my parents just before the election after hiding dysphoria for nearly 20yrs (I'm 30). Unfortunately, the dysphoria has been intense enough that I'm so dissociated that I can barely function, so as you might imagine, I'm currently living with parents.

My dad's reaction was basically, "whoever the best you is, be that you".

My mom's reaction was "but you're my son... I always wanted to have a brother and you're kinda like that".

Meanwhile my grandparents voted for Trump after saying they wouldn't, and are now crying about it. Literally. My grandmother was in tears.

So my mom is also dealing with that, and possibly osteoporosis, which meant she said, "it's gonna take time to process this".

Then last night she told me that I wasn't allowed to start hrt until I moved out.

She refuses to let me tell her why I can barely function. She refuses to let me describe what I'm going through. She says she "can't handle it", that "it's not a top priority right now", that she's "trying to understand" why I've made this "choice" while also telling me things like "but I like you the way you are" and rejecting any information I send to her because she'd rather consult her friends that she "trusts more".

She starts to have a panic attack whenever I try to talk to her about it and God forbid I tell her that she made a mistake because then I obviously hate her guts and want her to die. She's literally accused me of that.

It hurts like hell but I don't know how to get out of this situation. I don't know how long it'll take hrt and therapy to get me on my feet all while not having a job. All this while in Texas. I'm fucking scared.

Edit: I also kinda wonder if I was born intersex and that's why my mom is freaking out. I'd think my dad would know and would say something, but idk. I've heard of times where one parent had an intersex kid """fixed""" without the other parent knowing. It honestly might explain some shit if I was born intersex.

Trying not to think too hard about it. I'm waiting for the idiots at work to try and bring anything up, but they've been uncharacteristically quiet. At least around me. I'm pretty sure I'm the token liberal to these nitwits.

I don't argue with people, I slowly explain to them what Republicans lawmakers are doing. Try as hard as possible not to be conescending.

I explain how Biden and Obama are better at convicting and deporting, why Trump's cruelty is so innefficient.

I explain that Trump said he had nothing to do with project 2025 and now Matt Walsh and Fox News are explaining their plans which coincidentally align with project 2025.

I explain the Trump Tax Plan, which is identical to last time, how it raised everybody's taxes below a certain amount.

Sometimes they tell me "but that Harris was an idjet" and I explain how she wanted to bring back child tax credits and vowed to never raise taxes on anyone below 400k annual earnings. They ask "well she didnt say that during the CNN Interview or debates!" and I direct them to her website where every single policy is laid out clearly.

Many of them do not understand the ramifications of the situation they have caused. They are completely unaware of the consequences of their actions, expect life to go on as if their side just won at sports without any impact on the real world. It is easy to ignore and be ignored if thats what you want to do in a red state.

When people try to threaten me I can be very intimidating as a result of my natural physique. Fear is something I will die before showing any of these people. They respect strength, the simple fools, it can get you far in their world.

That's how I do.

Mostly just worried for my trans friends and family.

Married het cis male. Wife is absolutely bent out of shape due to our states bull shit abortion ban and with Trump being in office again. We had been talking about a second kiddo... But she told me that she wanted me to get a vasectomy Monday morning at 8am. She's not leaving her life in the hands of old dudes.

So.. I'm going to schedule it for inauguration day .

Other than that.. okay. Tho.. I did buy another carry gun. ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Edit: voted Dem all the way down ballot.

It's ok here because I'm in a left leaning city, trans kid (my youngest) will be adult soon so can begin medical care whenever they can afford it; any daughters who are at all into men have IUDs, and in general everything has been ok, except for school but that kid is a little bit insulated because it's an art school and they DGAF about the state saying they can't use nicknames or preferred gender. So that is ok but the actual teaching in the academic classes has faltered, getting bad like when I went to school here, and it's so disappointing after it had gotten so good for awhile.

Thanksgiving may be fractious because we have trans, communists, right wing, right-leaning, about half progressive leftist, one sort of prickly vegan (not prickly about us being omnivore, just more delicate sensibilities), it's always very mixed and rowdy like that, tensions seem higher but OTOH my ex has become more reasonable.

Bracing for economic downturn, hopefully it lets some people get into houses, who cannot now. And hopefully can stay employed, pretty old so have made it through several recessions already.

I'm in Texas in a blue bubble - more than i had realized i guess. 80% of the people i know are blue. I work in public education, so most of the red people i know were considering voting blue because of the push for school vouchers. I rarely see maga stuff and the yard signs around me were 80% Harris. Because of that i was completely shocked last Tuesday by the popular vote and it's left me kind of disoriented. My husband works in redville, so he's disgusted and exhausted. My adult sons are sad, mad, scared. My DIL has called me crying a few times - her parents are trumpsters and she wants to cut them out. Luckily we have enough cash on hand to help the kids get passports ASAP and enough savings to briefly go out of state/country if she needs healthcare. I 70% believe that Republican infighting will slow them down and it won't be as bad as feared, 30% ready for the leopards!

Feeling depressed, trapped, and abandoned. Going through the motions, trying to come to terms that I won't be a dad because the wife doesn't want to risk a pregnancy under the conditions, and I won't be a homeowner because no ones coming to help build houses or stop corporate real estate. Accepting I won't be starting a business because I can't risk losing healthcare, and will need every dollar I can hang on to. Settling for serfdom. You know, usual shit.

How are you.

Considering if I should pull out of the ACA plan (not renew) or stay in and hope they don't touch it come 2025. If they make any cuts or kill it, I will not be able to pay for the plan on my own, even a very low dollar one. Living's overrated anyway, if my health goes in the gutter after 2025, RIP me I guess.

Planning on teaching the young folks in the friend group how to garden and preserve food, how to make simple medications, how to defend themselves. And I'm also planning to leave as soon as I get my bachelor degree to pursue a research PhD in another country. I'm in ecology and conservation, there's no future for me here.

I grew up in a progressive city in a gerrymandered-to-hell swing state. Cheeto's first win promptly sent me into a tailspin there. I've moved a handful since but now find myself in MT 80 miles from the border, you know, just in case.

Red up here is different than red down there. There it was like rubbing salt in the wound, here it's quite obviously because there aren't enough people to know any different.

I'm nonbinary and have been laid off in Florida about it, so I no longer disclose that information professionally. It's not the most pleasant, but hey, hiding in plain sight is a really good way to see what's coming down the pike.

Pro: a handful of my state's absolute worst officials are set to quit their jobs and we get a do-over.

Con: they're quitting to join the administration and they'll be way more powerful and everyone else will suffer.

Sorry. I did what I could.

I developed a pretty strong sense of apathy for most of the people around me, who either won't vote or vote for whatever Fox News tells them too.

That being said, I'm fearful for the friends I have that feel they will need to hide who they are just to go about their lives.

Thankful I'm privileged, white, and straight passing.

Meh. I want to try to move to Minnesota some day. Seems like a nice place. They have laws preventing employers from firing people over off-premise off-duty marijuana use. That just sounds worth doing even if the higher paying jobs are otherwise abusive and shitty. I have 2 degrees in tech.

and before this comment chain turns into a dumpster fire, I have no desire to work while high. I just wanna smoke weed at home, that's it.