this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2024
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badposting

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badposting is a comm where you post badly


This is not a [email protected] alternative. This is not a [email protected] alternative. This is a place for you to post your bad posts.

Ever had a really shitty bit idea? Joke you want to take way past the point of where it was funny? Want to feel like a stand-up comedy guy who's been bombing a set for the past 30 minutes straight and at this point is just saying shit to see if people react to it? Really bad pun? A homemade cringe concoction? A cognitohazard that you have birthed into this world and have an urge to spread like chain mail?


Rules:

  1. Do not post good posts.
    • Unauthorized goodposting is to be punished in the manner of commenting the phrase "GOOD post" followed by an emoji that has not yet been used in the thread
    • Use an emoticon/kaomoji/rule-three-abiding ASCII art if the rations run out
  2. This is not a comm where you direct people to other people's bad posts. This is a comm where you post badly.
  3. This rule intentionally left blank.
  4. If you're struck for rule 3, skill issue, not allowed to complain about it.

Code of Conduct applies just as much here as it does everywhere else. Technically, CoC violations are bad posts. On the other hand: L + ratio + get ~~better~~ worse material bozo

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago (1 children)

They tell me to drink more fluids, but also to drink less beer???

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

what am i supposed to drink now that i'm too old to digest lactose properly and carbonated corn syrup drinks taste like shit?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago

"Two pots of coffee is too much" yawn

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

My doctor (who is some short guy's wife, btw) keeps telling me I shouldn't be "Irishing up" my coffee 7 days a week. I can only assume she's pro English and doesn't want to see Ireland re-unified.

Also, unrelated note, due to lactose intolerance issues, I've swapped out Baileys Irish Cream in my morning Irish coffee with absinthe.

Edit:

Here's my daily Irish coffee recipe: 30mL espresso (decaf on weekends so I can fit an afternoon nap in), 60mL absinthe. Usually take 1 at 10:00 and another at 15:00. Usually double the espresso and the absinthe on a Monday, because Mondays, amirite?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

When my mom died I got a migraine every day, so while waiting for the doctor I did the same but added orange juice since orange juice (especially the environmental disaster in a bottle kind) and absinthe is legit. Caffeine + alcohol means no migraine but all the pretty colors for me.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Open your windows more often.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

... this is just what an owl would tell me, damn birds, git! Scram! :)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

let me in

i know you have mice in there

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

I once went in to my [former] provider complaining of chronic repeated ear and sinus infections. I apparently didn't yelp in pain loudly enough when PA Numbnuts started tapping on my sinus cavities, so he basically told me that I was just fat and needed to run around the mall at 4 AM with the local "mall walkers" group. Two days later, another ear/sinus infection hit and I needed antibiotics. I ended up getting them somewhere else because I didn't want to deal with that pedantic asshole ever again. Six months later, yet another infection hit, this time with an abscess in one of my tonsils. I wound up in the emergency room for surgery. If only I'd waddled around the fucking mall at 4 AM, maybe all that extremely obvious damage to my tonsils from the repeated ear/nose/throat infections would have been magically healed.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

I do feel this way sometimes. I wish the doctor would just say “there’s nothing I can do for you” instead of giving me advice that is simultaneously condescending and vague. I’m not making an appointment with a physician so that I can get a TikTok’s worth of uninspired life coaching. You assholes decided that your precious profession needed a monopoly on medicine while also artificially lowering the supply of doctors so that you could make more money and feel important. You turned yourselves into glorified pill dispensers because you don’t have time for anything else. Not my problem. If you want to make a living telling people to jog and eat kale then become a wellness guru on Instagram and leave the medicine to someone who wants to dispense pills.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago (2 children)

never met a doctor that wasn't a stuck up prick tbh. there must be lessons in med school about how everybody that's not a doctor is a dumb baby who frequently forgets how to breathe

Death to America

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

You must be extremely unlucky, every doctor I’ve ever had has been either incredibly kind or just outright hilarious or both.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

I've met a mix the specialty makes it better or worse too, some areas have a different character, for example family medicine tends to be more down to earth and there's a reason a whole ton of fasc and chud leadership come out of other specialties esp surgeons. Never be more than one minority around those sorts, that's how you're fucked.

Second the statement, may it choke to death on the carcasses of all those it murdered.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

What…no medicine? Communists.