729
submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 78 points 1 month ago

To this day I don't know how to read Tweets in the right order. I always feel like I'm reading a Carnac joke.

[-] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago

I know how to read them, but I still always read the top tweet first, then the original tweet, then the top tweet again....

I know, I'm dumb

[-] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

YouTube to MP3.

YOUTUBE TO MP3!

Opens envelope and blows into it, pulling out a card

What are some fun beginner crimes for someone getting into lawlessness?

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Think Jeopardy.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Retweets are like parentheses in math

^sorry if this shows up as a double comment, i'm not sure why it wasn't posting my comment^

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago
[-] tigeruppercut 2 points 1 month ago

Carnac

I never watched Carson but then I found out about art fern a couple years ago. Looks like I've got another set of sketches to look up now

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[-] [email protected] 68 points 1 month ago

Steal an unloved kitten and give her a good home

[-] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago

I knew there were some unsavory-types here on Lemmy, but I didn't know there were f'n monsters here. How do you sleep at night, you ghoul?

[-] [email protected] 39 points 1 month ago

Probably surrounded by kitties

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

That now have good homes.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Any outdoor cats without tags that you can convince to live with you is legally yours.

Don't let your cats outdoors, people. Free cats.

[-] [email protected] 39 points 1 month ago

Posts direct content from news articles on Lemmy to save clicks and deny clickbait traffic.

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[-] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Changing your own lightbulb was illegal in Victoria Australia until 1998.

Australia is pretty strict about electrical stuff, and only qualified electricians can perform electrical work, including work on any electrical fixtures. Light bulbs were counted as a fixture, until the law was amended in 1998 to specifically exclude light bulbs.

Australia is still a lot stricter than the USA in terms of electrical work you can do to your own house. It's still illegal to replace a light switch or outlet if you're not a qualified electrician.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Do they have people inspecting it to make sure you haven't?

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Seriously. It sounds like a law that would be rather difficult if not impossible to enforce.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

In Chicagoland there are places where you can't even plug something into an outlet because of Unions. I'm all for Unions, but some (especially the police) of them are basically shadow governments with their own special rules.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago

Don't use YouTube to MP3, use one of the Deemix variants that downloads music straight from Deezer's servers.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I think its still piracy but i pay for deezer just so i can use deemix to get their FLACs lol.

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[-] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

When you cross the street put your first step just over the crosswalk paint. Watch out for cops though, they'll shoot!

[-] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago

Sir this is America. They would be shooting anyway.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Only if you're brown or darker...

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Or an acorn. Or sleeping…

[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Remove the tag from a couch that isn't yours.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

That tag could be useful!

[-] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Not a crime and also completely legal

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

It is violation of copyright?

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Civil matter, not criminal

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

No it's completely legal. It's called time shifting.

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago
[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I'm fine with bank heists but please don't loiter :(

edit: English not my first language yada yada, I confused "loitering" for "littering"... I'm fine with loitering after all

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Buy legal weed. Still federally illegal.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Download pirated games and movies. 🏴‍☠️

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Practice shoplifting a little every time. Especially if you also have friends who want to get into crime.

[-] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Yes, start small, lift the plastic door off the hinges; then slowly go for the bigger stuff; hit the gym as swell to make it a little easier on yourself. Eventually you'll be able to lift that whole ass target.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Local target store stolen in its entirety, investigators baffled

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Primary suspect is a Californian woman in a carmine trenchcoat

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Carry a screwdriver with replaceable bits and slowly dismantle everything, one screw at a time.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

I got a Target on my back and it's heavy as fuck

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago
[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

Phoenicia where thieves would literally lift the corner of a shop in order to snatch the sweet, sweet olives within

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Drive past a red light at an empty intersection at 1am

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

crossing the street beside, but not on, a sidewalk

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Wear sunglasses at night

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

That used to be called limewire

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this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2024
729 points (99.1% liked)

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