this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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600 comments and about 90% are "I'm gonna try this for a promotion ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ‘Œ" or "Just.. Wow... The world is fucked" redditors are truly as gullible as the facebook boomers

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[โ€“] [email protected] 69 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I think being a straight white Male just makes me undesirable in a place like Toronto.

Truly the most oppressed demographic peterson-pain

[โ€“] [email protected] 37 points 3 months ago

The persecution complex here probably does tbh. Everytime you meet these people it oozes out of every pore.

[โ€“] [email protected] 66 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Then he gets asked to invite his boyfriend to the company holiday party, finds a fake boyfriend, falls in love through some hijinks, and lives happily ever after.

[โ€“] [email protected] 52 points 3 months ago (1 children)

So I pretended to be gay at a job interview, and now everyone's asking to meet my boyfriend at the holiday party.

I got one of my friends to pretend to be my boyfriend

Everyone loves him, he's a hit

We kiss in front of them (as per our agreement)

Kissing him felt good, what's happening to me?

A few months later, he tells me that he likes me and wants us to be a real relationship

Well, guess I'm actually gay now boykisser

[โ€“] [email protected] 30 points 3 months ago

An early 2000s romcom in an alternate universe where positive attitudes on homosexuality where mainstreamed a lot sooner.

[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago

Kind of like 'The Proposal' if Sandra Bullock played a gay woman

[โ€“] [email protected] 56 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The level of rage bait on reddit is exactly as bad as Facebook but redditors also simultaneously consider themselves the smartest people in the room and literally superior to people who use other apps.

The other day there was a post about how somebody loved their daily ritual of earing a bunch of bacon with a coworker at their desk everyday but then they got a new hire who was a black women and also probablly a muslim who complained about it and everybody in thenoffice agreed she was an annoying buzzkill.

Not one single comment pointing out it was a victim fantasy of a 14 year old boy.

[โ€“] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

redditors also simultaneously consider themselves the smartest people in the room and literally superior to people who use other apps

Funny when the exact opposite is true

[โ€“] [email protected] 40 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Dude is gay as hell. Admitting that you're gay is one the gayest things you can do.

[โ€“] [email protected] 27 points 3 months ago

Redditor said it himself he-admit-it

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

now im just imagining this guy getting a bunch of homophobia leveled at his new workplace.

[โ€“] [email protected] 39 points 3 months ago (1 children)

If this was somehow real theyre still going to find out hes a straight white male victim guy in like a day tops

[โ€“] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

not a lot they can do about that though

[โ€“] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Yea they'll have to wait like 12 hours before somebody who's this much of a pathetic loser does something stupid and commits a fireball offense.

[โ€“] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago

Fireball offense takes out the whole office and rehires everyone

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

The employee

[โ€“] [email protected] 35 points 3 months ago

Honestly they were probably relieved that they could safely lowball him instead of paying the non-political rate.

[โ€“] [email protected] 30 points 3 months ago (1 children)

"I think being a straight white male makes me undesirable in a place that has over a million straight white males and used to be 45% straight white males"

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

i mean toronto today is often considered the most diverse major city in north america, even more than NYC. but ofc diversity has nothing to do with white male privilege, south africa is less than 10% white and white people are still ridiculously advantaged

[โ€“] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I said I voted for hillary in job and they gave it to me for supporting democracy. ๐Ÿฅน

[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

Shit I gotta stop hiding how much i love democracy, and tell my boss I'm a communist

[โ€“] [email protected] 28 points 3 months ago

Assuming it's real, I don't see the problem, that's just hustler grindset mentality. If the job market wants gay, then give them gay, libs and chuds are always saying you have to adapt very-smart

[โ€“] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago

the lathe of heaven turns as God cackles, a fate string spins off wildly towards the OP, striking him in his loins, he needs to suck cock now. What is this hunger? This isn't how it was supposed to go!!

[โ€“] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago

heads up: this only works in June.

[โ€“] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago

That interviewer's name? Gay Albert Einstein

[โ€“] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Feels potentially real to me, corporations love performative allyship, just look at the attempted cooption of pride. I could absolutely see a company prioritising queer hires (in certain industries.)

[โ€“] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago

the being called brave part seems fake to me, in 2020s toronto?? how would you even drop that naturally? i'm bi and if i dropped some info that showed it people might try to virtue signal a little but they don't wanna seem like an over the top weirdo

a quick google and it's one of the gayest cities in north america with a whole lgbtq enclave, 1 in 5 identify, they probably have plenty of visibly queer employees

[โ€“] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago

when I started using a new name for job applications, i had not had a call back in close to a year of job searching haha yes

i eventually gave up looking for specialised work and got a job as a cleaner, through a friend

homophobic dork doesnt think he's good enough for a job

[โ€“] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

The interviewer probably just happened to be queer themselves and liked the common ground lmao

[โ€“] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago

So awesome how I am afraid to come out to all of my coworkers and friends and family as pan and agender but these fuckhead straight Redditors think it's hilarious to pretend to be queer. Must be nice.

[โ€“] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

niko-happy down with cis niko-happy

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

I mean obviously a shitty thing to do and I think they've likely exaggerated bits of this due to their own personal bias of gay people being treated better, but certain institutions do have diversity standards, that if managed, help them to get public and private funding. 'Ethical' business practice is hot right now for big investors. It really throws democrat-adjacent liberals off your scent.

It also depends on the industry. My industry may be a bubble in this respect, but having a 'protected characteristic' can be advantageous in some respects. I often see jobs with schemes that openly guarantee an interview to such candidates, based off their protected characteristic alone. Of course, I can see the reasoning, and they'll still face other prejudice in the workplace, but it can be easily abused by people who are inclined to do so, especially in regards to the unprovable claim of non-heterosexuality. I've seen a lot of people make very tenuous claims to queerness (I know, I know, you can't tell someone what they are and aren't... I've HAD queer experiences and pondered my own claim to such a label) to assist in landing a job.

I'm not saying such hiring practices shouldn't be in place, although they perhaps are a liberal band aid. I just think they can be abused easily (though abuse of it is probably not commonplace)... that said given it's a Redditor I am inclined not to believe his experience of it.

[โ€“] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (2 children)

What is this take? If the line between starving and not is "lie to the psychopaths who demand 40 hours of my week about X", I will absolutely be lying about X. The abusers here are the ones demanding you destroy your body and soul for shareholder value.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I'm not sure where I stand on it. Would you say it's okay to falsify a protected characteristic? (potentially blocking an 'authentic' person from getting the role)

Maybe I'm identity politics poisoned. Of course, if you're starving then sure, but for the most part people aren't at that point in the US/UK, otherwise there'd be more realistic hope of revolution.

[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The role isnt as a gay man, we're obviously not promoting people don blackface or something.

I'm not super thrilled with an employer recording sexuality for anyone, obviously its more complex than this, but the boundaries of what makes someone straight are so fuzzy and personal, I wish we werent all stuck discussing the importance.

Anyway this story is fake, and you shouldnt really be discussing sex at work anyway, I'm cranky sorry

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Part of me wants to fake an application to one of the "traditional values" places hiring so I can describe, in detail, how much I love sucking dick at the interview

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I dont think anyone here really cares about lying to get a job. Idk what the point youre trying to make is.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

I would've thought this site would care more about that sort of thing because you're potentially taking a spot away from an 'authentic' queer person. I'm not trying to concern troll.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Dude's lying hard