this post was submitted on 24 Sep 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 57 points 3 months ago

Run it in your head, find the edge cases yourself, fix the bug... weakling.

Or do what I do in real life which is patch in new bugs and even a security flaw or two.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 3 months ago (2 children)

the energy of a chaotic neutral?
"maybe it'll work, maybe it won't, but it'll be FUN"

or chaotic evil?
"naw. fuck y'all's weekend.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Merging failing tests so everybody else has failing tests and wastes time figuring out why.

Nothing neutral here

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I haven’t played DnD in like 20 years. Is “Chaotic Dickhead” an alignment now?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

That's basically just chaotic neutral

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That's what the pipeline is for. It's not that hard to pinpoint the commit that lead to the errors.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

If I rebase my branch with main I do not expect any failing tests. If you waste my time merging shit code, fuck you. Fix your shit.

Unless prod is on fire and the CEO is prowling (even then, I'd argue standards should be maintained)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

I don't say this is good practice, you shouldn't even be able to merge to main with failing tests. I've implemented an emergency flag to do this, but I don't want to use it in normal, daily business.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

"maybe it'll work, maybe it won't, but it'll be FUN"

Flashback to that Tom Cruise Scientology interview 🤣:

It really is ... Fun.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

On a scale of one to translunar orbit, how freaking high was he?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Tests are just booby traps for the other engineers so they don't break your code by mistake.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Its funny cause its true. I often design tests to be "if a case/enum value is added this test will explode and tell them to add code here"

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

This is why I like strong type systems with exhaustivity checks

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Saaaaame. But sometimes even strongly typed stuff wont break on compilation time

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

'spose that's true enough

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Real programmers test in production.

[–] [email protected] 65 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They were under a lot of pressure.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They were under a lot of pressure.

It was sink or swim.

[–] Honytawk 8 points 3 months ago

No time to cave in

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

You mean like this?

Or like this?

What does that mean, 'To play us out'?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

Users will test, don't waste your energy.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

While I know that these days, bugs in code can cause real-world harm (personal info leaks, superannuation records lost, lol google), I find it humorous to think of the equivalent, even worse outcomes in my discipline (chemical/process engineering).

"Didn't do any checks, fuck it, I know this calculation is fire 🔥"

Later: 🔥🔥💥

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

It’s more: I have routed a few pipes in our test system and it’s now spitting out water known to be contaminated but now should have some extra sprinkles in so it’s fine.

What I’m saying is it’s even worse than didn’t do any checks. It’s willfully ignoring existing checks intentionally.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago

Oh I trust my code, but I don't trust my coworkers not to break something on the very next commit.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago

tests are for confirming your code STILL works if someone ever changes something

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I get a small amount of joy from clicking the "request changes" button and blocking some doofus from merging lazy untested code.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

I love going into a PR with 3 approvals already and shitting all over it

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

I physically reacted to this post with a combination of disgust, anger, and fear. Do tests. All of the tests. Randomize the order in which your tests run. Cover all branches.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Users are the acceptance testers.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

It baffles me when people use flex layout when it's clearly visually a grid layout. Nothing here is flexing with varying element sizes and auto-fill-wrap-break of items.

A colleague of mine prefers flex too. But to me, grid is so much more intuitive and simple.

https://css-tricks.com/quick-whats-the-difference-between-flexbox-and-grid/

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Tbh I'm not a web person (more of a backend person) and don't know the recommended practices. display: grid; is a good friend of mine xD

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

I think using display: grid; as your default is the better default, so you're all set. :)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Why do you need either? Just throw the both in the html

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

People can pull from my cold, dead hands.

(though I'm usually only using it to display some status just for me and not for external consumption; the UI side can have a JSON if it ever comes to that).

I used to be a full-stack dev, but I've been pure backend for so long now, everything I knew is outdated or deprecated.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

everything I knew is outdated or deprecated

Given the way the frontend world seems to work, this means you’ve been backend-only for at least a week lol

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

Weak code lacks tests

Alt: if strength relies on unity I need to switch to game dev

[–] velvetThunder 5 points 3 months ago

You can't trust others to not break your wonderful code. Write tests for the regression.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

"Tester, c'est douter"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Just wow bug free code y'all smh

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

The best way is to try it over and over until it works and then assume it works but then go insane wondering where all the edge case bugs are coming from.

I wrote a test one time.