this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2024
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askchapo

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And the bigger question, will he still be my friend when I WIPE THE FLOOR WITH HIM party-sicko

Also remember this is who you think would win, not who you like more

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

natural born citizen clause might be a problem for a literal alien running mate

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 weeks ago

writing in Hillary because she's electable if you vote for her

[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I think both sides are bad

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

@[email protected] our feud will be legendary! Have at thee!

arm-L owl-pissed arm-R

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 weeks ago

Shh don't tell them. I can take a good accent

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

Need to start every conversation with Australians this way until they get the message and stop trying to be.

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 weeks ago

I dislike Dirt_owls policy of piss and shit everywhere. Ulysses gets my vote. Make slop great again!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 weeks ago

I'm voting for UlyssesT to end the treat based economy. I can't trust no stinkin bird to not be swayed by treats!!! TREATOCIDE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

The dreg queen is cool but dirt_owl is gleebozorx friend posadist-nuke

There's no beating gleebozorx friend

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago (6 children)

I have my own alien supporter friends!

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

You people do realise he is a far superior debator and with destroy me in the first debate lmao

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

But there will be much more hooting from your side of the audience so it cancels out.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago

Selling merch for both sides porky-happy

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago

Not one single vote for Eugene_V_Dabs?

kind-vladimir-ilyich

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago

we love our power posters

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Sorry UlyssesT, I'm going Talkeetna style on this vote and say we vote to make the town mascot that is dirt owl the mayor.

Ref: Mayor Stubbs

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

Every afternoon, Stubbs went to a nearby restaurant and drank water mixed with catnip out of a wine or margarita glass.

Lmao based

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Damn it's neck and neck. 50:50. Could be anyone's race. For a dollar I'll cycle my IP a couple of times and enter some cheat votes.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago

For every vote you cheat I'm gonna cheat in two smuglord

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Dirt_owl has no outwardly strong opinions which makes them the Democrat since Democrats never run on policy, which means they would probably win. UlyssesT has lots of strong opinions which would make him the Republican candidate, but he would lose because his opinions aren't anywhere near reactionary enough to actually win over Republican voters.

I think I took this too seriously.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

UlyssesT could win with a microtargetted campaign that shows each chud ads with the UlyssesT opinion on the specific treats that they personally get riled up about while ommiting his opinion on what they actually like but building the AI slop cannon torment nexus is the antithesis of everything he stands for.

Dirt_owl will end up losing the democrat base because the only thing they care about is decorum whereas Dirt_owl will spend the entire campaign making piss jokes.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago

I promise to press the communism button my first day in office owl-wink

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Dirty bird will win but not before finding out what cyber bullying really means.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago

The Dunk Tank will turn into The Bird Bath

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago

Dirtowl has more name recognition

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

I just hope both teams have fun.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

Vote Owl no matter howl

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

(insert image of the "i voted" wolf sticker here)

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

Why isn't there a hexbear electoral college?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago

Drumph Owl is stealing the election!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago

I'm going to do a heccin voter fraud to vote for you both 10 times because you should both be president

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I voted for everyone's favorite dirt birb. While Ulysses is a patriot for killing Kissinger, I will always stand behind a avian.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

I'm worried about my friends who are voles, they are scared of being eaten by the owl. @[email protected] , can you commit to a non-vole based diet if elected?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

This is how Bernie can still win

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

Fuck me i voted for dirty owl but THEY'RE LITERALLY NOT EVEN AMERICAN, THEY CAN'T

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

Hmm. Why don't we host a fake election for fun?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

Dort oil piss and shits everywhere and ouless makes fun of me for watching every marvel movie in a row every weekend, so I'll vote for the lesser evil of dork wol

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

I don't belive you would wipe the floor with him, because that could be considered an act of cleaning. You would still win though.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This election would be a real Game of Thrones

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