this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2024
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[–] [email protected] 122 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I'm not a 12 yo boy, I'm not a 12 yo boy, I'm not a 12 yo boy

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Don't worry, the scientific community is working on getting it renamed to solve exactly this problem.

It's going to be called "urectum".

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I'm a genuine proponent of renaming Uranus to "Caelus." It's the only planet (save earth) not named for a Roman god. It's named for a Greek god, and completely breaks the naming convention. Funny word play aside, I'd like to see it renamed Caelus.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Caelus would fit perfectly in our solar system.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Right? Such a cool name! I also would not mind if they renamed earth to Terra, though, to keep the trend. But if we keep Uranus, we should make earth Gaia, so Uranus won't be so lonely as the only Greek in the solar system.

I may, may, be anthropomorphizing our planets a bit

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean since it's 71% covered in water, how about Poseidia?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How does one select the ending of the word, like how would one know to choose Poseidia instead of Poseidus?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

The best formula for solutions haha. Here I thought you knew some magic space nomenclature guidelines.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Hey don't talk about Uranus like that.

Uranus is good enough, smart enough, and goshdarnit, people like Uranus.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Rectum? Damn near killed em!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

Relax friend. You are safe. That was a long time ago and Father McCoy is not around anymore.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

pfft BWA-HAHAHAHHHAA

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

None of us are (hopefully). Doesn't make the joke any less funny to our 12 year old senses of humour.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Maybe it just got a kiss from Neptune

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Is that the Roman version of Poseidon’s kiss?

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 month ago

eh. As no mer s: H-eh. As-stro-no-me-r-s.

Am I doing it right?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Wet, I can understand. But cold?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Ever driven 45 minutes home after bottoming? It get pretty cold before you get to a shower

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Things I never realized being a straight man

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Let me help every woman you'll sleep with going forward, then. Don't just jizz on the bed when you pull out. It also gets cold, but now it's where you need to sleep. Lol.

Also don't get it in their hair, it's a bitch to get out if it dries. Invest in a daily glass of pineapple juice, though, and you probably won't have to worry about it where to end. They won't mind swallowing so much

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Lmao. I'm an old man with a kid and a committed GF. We always have something to take care of it. But thanks for the PSA.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Why would you not just shower afterwards?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Not always an option. What if you've just been fucked in a field? There's no shower. Or more likely, the handicap stall at a Walmart halfway between your houses because neither of you can host, and you live 2 hours apart

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

It is pretty close to where the sun doesn't shine.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

maybe it's a windy day

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

not my anus

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Shouldn't they be looking at the night sky, though?

[–] treadful 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

And that’s to say nothing of Uranus’ moons, of which there are nearly 30.

Damn. Surprised that many can last that long and not destroy each other.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

The gas Giants are huge, like really really huge. Jupiter and Saturn have more than that. The rings from Saturn are probably from moons, but not necessarily colliding, but getting close enough to the planet to reach the Roche Limit.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

These moons will destroy uranus

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

thats very poor choice of words

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

thats very ~~poor~~ excellent choice of words

They knew what they were doing

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

there was a poll among astronomers whether they should rename uranus, and they almost unanimously decided to keep it that way because it got funding just due to giggles.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

In Futurama, they renamed it to Urectum :)

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Nah that’s my wife, carry on

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Yeah, I felt it

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

get it? because it sounds like your anus pfhdtfht