this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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[–] [email protected] 77 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (5 children)

I would vote for Biden over Trump if Biden came and took a shit on my cat then used my hamster to wipe his ass.

This is a r/brandnewsentence I swear.

You're an artist.

I’d honestly prefer to wipe my ass with your cat. I don’t think your hamster has enough surface area to really get my butt clean.

cognitohazard REDDIT PARTICLE LEVELS CRITICAL cognitohazard

[–] [email protected] 49 points 8 months ago

These kinds of people make me feel better about my creative output. Wake me up from a drunken stupor and my jokes will still be better than these megaton reddit bombs

[–] [email protected] 45 points 8 months ago

It's reassuring that I can post some of the stupidest stuff to this website and still be leagues ahead of redditors

[–] [email protected] 39 points 8 months ago (2 children)

They’re dumber than they used to be, right?

[–] [email protected] 29 points 8 months ago

covid brainmelt is real

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 31 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Give that man a cookie for winning the internet!

[–] [email protected] 27 points 8 months ago

They really narwhaled the mfing bacon dean-smile

[–] [email protected] 76 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (4 children)

It's propaganda. The far left are falling for the 2016 playbook all over again.

agony-consuming barbara-pit

[–] [email protected] 54 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Certainly someone is stuck in 2016 lol

[–] [email protected] 45 points 8 months ago (1 children)

They're so convinced that they did nothing wrong in 2016 that they could never understand this.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 8 months ago

Nooo it was the ruZZians wojak-nooo

[–] [email protected] 28 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

What did the “far left” fall for in 2016? HILLARY WON BY MILLIONS OF VOTES. BUT THE ORANGE MAN BECAME PRESIDENT BECAUSE OF 100 RANDOM POLITICIANS

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago

Ah yes, the trillion dollar Hamas propaganda apparatus is at it again. The poor US doesn't hold a candle against it.

[–] [email protected] 57 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (3 children)

People also seem to forget he's the president of the USA, not of Israel, and he also doesn't get to decide unilaterally not deliver aid to Israel Congress has authorized. This is by design, autocrats are bad, for example see: bibi

hahahaha biden-supervised

[–] [email protected] 46 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 39 points 8 months ago

AP News? You mean Ansarallah Palestine News? Next time post a reliable news source.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I love when they immediatly switch from "you have to vote for him because he can stop fascism" to "the president of the US has literally no power to do anything so you can't expect him to do anything"

[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 months ago

Thus by a continual shifting of rhetorical focus, the president is both A Smol Bean and Our Only Hope

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago

Trump will literally have more power than the God Emperor if he wins, but Biden is just a smol bean who can't fix everything

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago

If that's the best those bootlickers can come up with then they're not trying at all

[–] [email protected] 50 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (4 children)

People in here are really arguing that sure Biden is directly and very actively funding a genocide and moving mountains to make that happen. But Trump would be funding a genocide even harder so vote Biden!!!!

What does it fucking take for a lib to realise the system is broken? Because apparently openly and borderline explicitly conspiring to commit genocide is not enough.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

I was permabanned from r/politics just the other day for simply pointing out the obvious fact that if Biden keeps doing what he's doing there isn't even going to be anyone left for Trump to genocide if/when he gets back in office.

It's just a complete denial of reality.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

These are the people calling you authoritarian

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago

Same mfers that talk about "a vote for 99% hitler is a vote against 100% hitler, so you *need *to for 99% hitler ☝️🤓" will also have the nerve to talk about authoritarianism and democracy desolate

[–] [email protected] 32 points 8 months ago

To them, hypothetical genocide is worse than actual genocide which is why they side with Israel.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago

They're also saying that directing foreign military policy or aid is not something you can just snap your fingers for, but if Trump was in there he'd nuke them by snapping his fingers

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 8 months ago (5 children)

The funny thing is, he's almost certainly telling Netanyahu to chill out behind closed doors. He just cant force him to do anything.

Correct. People think diplomacy works like a TV show. If they don't see it on the screen, it isn't happening. Calling Netanyahu out in public is one of the worst things Biden could do. It would strengthen him with his base at a time when he desperately needs to be out of office. It's almost like international diplomacy is complicated

International diplomacy is complicated, see despite the entire system being geared towards the eradication of the Palestinian people, it’s actually just Netanyahu that’s the problem. And anyways I had a dream Biden scolded Netanyahu despite actively supporting Israel in every statement (he’s secretly very mad).

[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago

Lol liberals saying other people view the world as a tv show. The US has no problem staging coups and assassinations but when western allies commit genocide, the leaders just need a stern talking to and their hearts will change.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago

what fucking copium are they huffing that they think brandon is wagging his finger behind the scenes LOLLL agony

[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

People think diplomacy works like a TV show. If they don't see it on the screen, it isn't happening. Calling Netanyahu out in public is one of the worst things Biden could do. It would strengthen him with his base at a time when he desperately needs to be out of office.

You see people think diplomacy is like what we see on tv, but I know that in reality its actually some people having clandestine meetings with snappy dialogue behind closed doors, where schemes upon schemes are made, and only brought into the public eye at an interesting climax. The only show that has gotten close to showing the truth is The West Wing

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago

I no longer believe any sort of "you'll love what's going on behind closed doors" bullshit. It has always just been a way to placate people. 90% of the time there is absolutely no reason not to have these things said in the open.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago

Biden is playing 5D chess with Bibi. Trust the plan

[–] [email protected] 33 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Let's see...I predict it will be mostly be "Ok, technically it is a genocide, maybe, if you stretch the definition, but Hamas is worse, so that makes it ok!"

EDIT: Huh, fascinating stuff in the first comment, complains about TikTok being the main Gen Z focused platform and talks about "reaching the kids" on there. No mention of China at all from that guy, I thought reddit believe that Tiktok is evil Chinese brainwashing and hated it.

And of course the classic "Sure, Biden is committing a genocide, but Trump would nuke them! I know Trump supporters who want him to nuke the whole Middle East!" Which is just fascinating to me. These guys kiss the ass of the Dems nonstop, knowing the Dems will never actually listen to them or institute policies that they like, but they are convinced that Trump will listen to his supporters and will actually do what they want. "Populism" to them seems to mean "A politician actually doing the things their voters voted them in for." Absolutely braindead.

I've had my fill of despair at the conditions of mankind from that first thread, I'm good. If there are any more gems I'll just have to miss out.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago (2 children)

“Populism” to them seems to mean “A politician actually doing the things their voters voted them in for.” Absolutely braindead.

And this brainrot is so common everywhere in so called "liberal democracies". A lot of them is straight up convinced that not doing this kind of "populism" is actually a sign of democracy and ~~good~~ lesser evil government.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago

Democracy is when the will of the people is pointedly ignored

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

I swear some of these people are politically motivated primarily through some kind of humiliation kink. Poldom, or something.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 27 points 8 months ago (2 children)

What's blowing my mind is instead of having possibly defensible takes about there being some margin between them when it comes to Palestine, they're acting like Biden is making a world of difference and that it would be SO much worse with Trump.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

also note the contradiction between how they defend Biden's complicity and/or outright support for the genocide of Palestinians because he's actually not *that *powerful - he's only the president of the United States!

But god forbid Trump was president - somehow he (despite holding the same role) would have the power to make things incomprehensibly worse in unspeakable ways! Vote blue!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago

With Trump we were always one executive order away from brownshirts marching down the street, with Biden I learned what a parliamentarian is.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago

deeply nonsensical

[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I know many of you aren’t on the ‘Trump is fascist’ train, but the Dems have played the role of the SDP to perfection. It’s like Biden is wearing the skins of Muller and Bruning

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

I don't want to actually you, but it's "SPD"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I always get it wrong because fucking Germans and their compounds treating "social democratic" like a single word

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Don't worry I mix it up myself all the time and I am German myself.

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