this post was submitted on 15 Apr 2024
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[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

Have you dated or fucked a cis bi person before? Did they treat you in ways that were gender affirming? This may just be my own insecurities but I'm so afraid of dating cis bi women because I'm scared that they'll mostly be attracted to my masculine traits or view me less of a woman than cis woman

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Also I'm kind a special case because idk if it's internalized transphobia or something but like If I perceive a woman to be more femme than me, I basically just want to top them or at most like... side. Which puts me in a weird spot in my head but like what ya gonna do. I'll really only bottom with men. But then also my friends tell me I'm pretty femme it's just that it sounds like I'm a woman talking through a Low voice. But idk I feel really weird about sex atm haha especially because I do have fun and I'm quite good at topping also trans tops are like in high demand...

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

What is side?

And yea, I think that is part of the problem for me :S

I've noticed trans tops are in demand for men because a lot are chasers and popular for lesbians because women trend towards subs/bottoms so it's like, there's too much ambiguity for me how much my tool factors into them liking me ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I totally get that yeah. Like I will say I have been with some people who actually seem to see me (not as just some girl with a dick or some.. thing with a dick) and I have been with one person who definitely kinda fetishized me and that felt GROSS. The first person who I felt saw me was actually a hookup but he definitely treated me like a feminine person and wasn't overly interested in my dick (honestly, he wasn't really that interested at all either way in my dick. He mostly wanted to fuck me).

The woman I saw Teo days ago also, idk. It felt like she mostly just saw me as a woman, or a trans woman. She never gendered me wrong. She didn't make me feel fetishized.

I guess that's really it though, I think it just depends on how someone makes you feel. Do they pass the vibe test. Unfortunately you'll only know I'd you go out with people though.

Idk if this matters but like... I dont pass at all. I'm hot, sure, but I don't pass. Most people think I'm a guy, in fact I got man'd on my date by some guy. But maybe this keeps extreme chasers away idk

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Idk if this matters but like... I dont pass at all. I'm hot, sure, but I don't pass. Most people think I'm a guy, in fact I got man'd on my date by some guy. But maybe this keeps extreme chasers away idk

This is actually quite reassuring because I'm in the same position haha

Idk how but hormones keep making my face more attractive but in more masculine ways ๐Ÿ’€

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Well at least you're getting hotter?? Haha my face is pretty masculine but idk.... I found out I can get ffs through my insurance and I'm like really thinking aboit it

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Nice! Hope you're happy with whatever you choose

I wasn't planning on getting ffs but now that I'm getting close to leaving my job, I'm feeling very tempted to get it if I can before going too just cause it'll be free

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Ok so it's kinda weird for me because yes I've fucked a bi woman however I was topping but that was also my choice. So, kinda hard to say what she was into about me. But I will say we went on a whole date beforehand and I felt pretty affirmed in my gender. So idk. I need more experience I think