I am Trump and i an taking a shit
this post was submitted on 08 May 2024
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chapotraphouse
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Came here to make this comment or upvote it.
It was a perfect shit. The best shit. All in front of the woke judges 
.
What's that smell? They said, and I said "That's what freedom smells like your honor." A big steaming pile of the best freedom money can buy. Did you know there is gold foil in there? That's why I wear the diapers. Shit's valuable you know? So I let the bumbs out back sift it out. There's one guy in the back alley who has a gold tooth. All that gold? Collected from my ass. He came to me with all the gold cleaned up and melted down with the dumpster fire. He brought it back to me. I said what do you want me to do with THAT! He showed me his cracked tooth - very nasty, very VERY nasty - and he asked me, "Mr. Trump, Sir. I spent three years cleaning the shit out of the diapers you toss out the window and here's all the gold I got." So I said what do you want me to do? He wanted me to fix his tooth. I was shocked - but then who else can say they helped the homeless like I do - I'm a nice guy. I build houses for a living. Like Jesus cause his daddy was a carpenter. He said in his father's house there are many rooms. There are many rooms in MY houses too! So I had the best idea - I'll pay for your broken tooth but it's gotta be gold and it's gotta be mine so you can tell everyone how nice I am.
Come on out here Two Tooth Tony. Eveyone give him a hand! What a hard working entrepreneur. That's the American Dream and a tooth made from the finest processd gold. Look at the 'T' that's etched in there! Show em the tooth Tony! Way to go Tiger!
This wins I think
When you eat the Trump Tower official Cinco de Mayo taco bowl.
OOOO HOT HOT HOoooOT
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=k30bOba64KQ&pp=ygUXcmFuZHkgbWFyc2ggaG90IGhvdCBob3Q%3D
The award popping up at the end is like a cherry on top of the bit.
I’m da burger, baybeee
"Mr President, a second turd has hit the toilet."
Get him the mother toilet, he's ready to make a deposit.
Trump loves the cops so much he has two on the job to wipe his own ass.
I thought this was one of those photos where someone's mouth is edited onto their eyes, but no, he just looks like that.
"uhhhh"
When they go whole hog and put it in too fast
'give me a minute, I'm spawning a new universe'
"Good dump, Mr. Trump, sir"
"I'm gonna brown!"
He looks like how I felt when I realized I spent my hard earned in game currency in WoW on a DPS helm instead of the tanking one, and I'd already put it on and all this was hours ago so I can't refund it.
Collecting 1100 justice points isn't quick or fun you guys.
“Now you’ve done it! Why, I oughta…!”
"Does anyone know the heimlich maneuver?"
"whoa boy, I'm taking a shit"
OooOOhooohohhhh I'm taking a shit!