this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2024
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chapotraphouse

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[–] [email protected] 48 points 2 months ago

NO ONE LOVE ME
BECAIUSE I ' M ‎ POOR

[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (7 children)

I love these accounts. They're set up to autogenerate a handful of templates. When one of the commenters is an actual human, they're prime people-watching. This photo is of course its own genre for them:

Sitting in traffic with Rebecca Black celebrating her 25th birthday. - https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=448024838162815&set=a.318863487745618&type=3&_rdr

Same thing but both legs are amputated and cars are imminently about to hit them: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=448016328163666&set=a.318863487745618

Two soldiers celebrating one's 25th birthday while sitting in traffic. Both are double amputees: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=448016164830349&set=a.318863487745618

Two soldiers celebrating one's 25th birthday while sitting in traffic. One is a double amputee, the other is uninjured: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=448008561497776&set=a.318863487745618

A double amputee soldier and a woman in an American flag bodysuit celebrating her 25th birthday on an even busier motorway: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=448008244831141&set=a.318863487745618

A street urchin and a wizard celebrating the wizard's birthday, age unknown legs intact, next to a road: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=448005938164705&set=a.318863487745618

Two old Sikh men, ages unknown legs intact, celebrating both of their birthdays on a motorway: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=447997871498845&set=a.318863487745618

A wizard and old Tim Pool, ages unknown legs intact, celebrating both of their birthdays on a road with a robust metro system: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=447997281498904&set=a.318863487745618

Tom Hanks in Castaway and a garden gnome, ages unknown legs intact, celebrating both of their birthdays on a road with no visible mass transit: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=447997218165577&set=a.318863487745618

A single amputee soldier crying in a missile silo while holding a sign that says "TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY NO ONE LOVE BECAUSE AM POOR": https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=447629144869051&set=a.318863487745618

A double amputee soldier crying in a missile silo in the forest while holding a sign that says "TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY NO ONE LOVES BECAUSE I AM POOR": https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=447588771539755&set=a.318863487745618

A double amputee soldier with Terminator prosthetics in a missile silo in the mountains holding a giant computer chip next to a placard that says "TODAY IS MS BIRTHDAY NO OONE LOVE LOVE BECAUSE I AM POOR": https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=447585464873419&set=a.318863487745618

A double amputee soldier being ignored by his entire family while holding a sign that says TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY "NO ONE LOVES ME BECAUSE (I'M POOR): https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=450442697921029&set=a.318863487745618

Three soldiers in a bunker, one taking COVID precautions, surrounded by eggs/yarn/succulents/old cameras/jars of honey: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=450328801265752&set=a.318863487745618

A whole series of mashups with Jesus and female pilots: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=450160244615941&set=a.318863487745618

One where it's a wizard pilot and a female pilot: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=450097667955532&set=a.318863487745618

A demon and an angel watching a child browse the internet but the child agrees with the demon: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=450084117956887&set=a.318863487745618

Jesus with "AMEN SKIP" written on his halo along with a female pilot surrounded by construction machinery and crashing planes: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=450079801290652&set=a.318863487745618

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I'd want to say only facebook grandmas fall for shit like this but some of the comments are like damn you're under 80 and you think this is real?

[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The organic interactions are so weird. It's like Elsagate for adults. They see Jesus or a soldier and they clap because they know that guy.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 months ago

Just like we got kids hooked on pregnant spider-man elsagate softcore porno we can get facebook grandmas addicted to the sweet tit of AI when we give them the ipad to keep them busy.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

A double amputee soldier with Terminator prosthetics in a missile silo in the mountains holding a giant computer chip next to a placard that says "TODAY IS MS BIRTHDAY NO OONE LOVE LOVE BECAUSE I AM POOR": https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=447585464873419&set=a.318863487745618

New fear unlocked: whatever the fuck is happening in his left leg.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

One hell of a pressure ulcer. His hyper-advanced terminator leg is poorly fitted which says a lot about the quality of healthcare at the future VA.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I wish I had a Facebook account so I could see some of those.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Most of them are sequential if you can click on the first one or google Babies adorable facebook Happy birthday solider. I don't have an account, used that search string, and was able to view the posts on my desktop.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

For me "happy birthday solider" via google images had this URL structure vvv

https://www.facebook.com/100090465305975/posts/413811894977651/

It's a soft paywall.

All the links in this thread are the hard paywalled because they are like this vvv

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=NUMBER&set=a.NUMBER&type=3&_rdr

Most of them are sequential

I don't know what that means.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

By sequential I mean that if you can click any of them, the others are at most a few posts before or after it. I reuploaded them to this album: https://imgur.com/a/gNcpdPn

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

An Imgur link was detected in your comment. Here are links to the same location on alternative frontends that protect your privacy.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

angel-biblical À̴̖͍͇̜̈̋͋͘͘͜͠M̴̨̨̡̙̥̠̠̌̎̔̉̕Ë̷̙́̽̔̃̒̏N̷̟͈͈̈͛̈́A̸̟͕͉̥͙̯̬̠͇̿̏̏͒̔̓́̌̅M̴̨̙̲̼̃Ė̷̛̖͉̣͗̆͊̿̒̈́̽N̷͎͎̄̅̓Ä̷̡͓̬͎̩͔͈͖̞́̾͊̃͒̌͝M̷̮̱͕̠̞̗͗͜͜Ê̷̺̬̮̽̒́̕N̶͎͕̹̔͛̍͐͊͜Ȧ̴̰̻̮̹̜̃̆̀̎͐̾̈́M̴̰͗̐̓͛͗́͗͝Ę̶̡͔̩̣̩͎̦̙͑N̴̫̰̙̹̞͕͖̐A̸͎̖̬̽̀́̏̒̓͐M̵̢̯̪̟̭͓͛͜ͅE̵͍̎̿̈́́̽̂̒̽͗̉N̴̡͕̯̄̒͗͑̓̍͐̈̕A̸̯̘̫̥̞̲̝̿̆͛͂̎M̴̫͙̹͖͙̫͇̠͊͒̈́͐̓́̊̑͘͝E̶̗͋̓͋̾̀̑͒̀N̵͉̺̤͓͔̊͊̈́̇̍̕͘͠Å̵͍̳̱͝M̵̧͚͈̩̟̗̾̌

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

this is the only shit that can still put a smile on my face

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

I lost both my legs posing for birthday photos in the middle of a freeway.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Fascinating stuff

[–] [email protected] 35 points 2 months ago

war man sad

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (5 children)

No one love you because you don't got no friggin pants on dude.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

Hard disagree. I love dudes even harder without their pants.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

The pants probably wouldn't fit over the cardboard embedded in his legs anyway

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

hey he might be wearing short shorts uh alongside the military top for some reason

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

He can’t afford pants 😭

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Walter White destroyed

[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 months ago

That's a hell of a paper cut.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 months ago

Get those flags off the floor you damn commie

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago

Could not find a single soldier to hold a cardboard sign surrounded by American flags.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago

I too have a bunch of flags littered around my workplace.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

What's he doing in a 1970s soviet power plant control room?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

I may have spoken too soon about AI, there may be some artistic merit after all.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

I like how any time it produces text it looks like a Cyrillic Lovecraftian language.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

our brave cybertroops

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

Thank you for your service sir 🫡

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

Please ban AI from SEO shit

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

The sign is readable this time. Was it included in the prompt?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

❤️😊🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

hmm who will i exploit with my garbage content today

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Damn they stole my sign

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

scary how the text is almost flawless now from the algorithms

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I was thinking it was added afterwards. Look at the attempt at text for the name badges

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Look at the word BECA\USE

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

FLAG CODE VIOLATION FLAG CODE VIOLATION LOOK AT THIS FUCKER HE'S VIOLATING THE FLAGS