104
You'll realize that lines total bullcrap in 10 seconds.
Aries works for this too.
My trick with astrology people is "i don't believe in astrology because i'm an aquarius".
this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2024
104 points (99.1% liked)
chapotraphouse
13392 readers
896 users here now
Banned? DM Wmill to appeal.
No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
Vaush posts go in the_dunk_tank
Dunk posts in general go in the_dunk_tank, not here
Don't post low-hanging fruit here after it gets removed from the_dunk_tank
founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
my trick with astrology people is pulling down my pants and taking a shit on the floor (i've been holding it a long time so it comes out quick) whenever they speak
"Thank God I'm an atheist."
What if they hit you with a lil', when the moon is in the seventh house, and Jupiter aligns with Mars ♫?
GOOD bit
I'm definitely going to remember this
I'm not a formal "astrologist", but I did choose bulbasaur in Pokemon Red. This means I have all of the good traits and none of the bad ones. I can mate with any other sign or pokemon but choose not to because bulbasaur is the wisdom symbol.
Assigned Slytherin At Birth
Scorpios are okay but by the time you can make more than a couple of them you're better off using your workshops to make onagers or just saving the resources for trebuchets.
Picking up on just enough astrology is a good way to pick up hot people with that crystal aesthetic. Then they look at my chart and its a recreation of the beginning of Toby Dammit so it doesn't last long.
The downside is that they believe in astrology.
the number of cute lesbians who have astrology brainworms is agonizingly high
True, but there's worse things that someone can believe in. Upside can get on their good side with very little effort.
Uh oh are we gonna have another astrology struggle session
I'm ENTJ. What's your sign?
LibLeft
Millennial
Antonio Gramsci's Useless Intellectual
I was just thinking it's been awhile since we got a good kerfluffle and astrology is juuust stupid enough to be right for it. here's hoping.
Another???
If you have misgivings about astrology it's because you hate women (pay no attention to the people who have been discriminated against on housing or jobs because of their astrological sign)
Not liking a system that assigns value to human lives based on immutable characteristics determined at birth is actually misogynist and homophobic sweaty
Actually, it's because you hate women AND queers
Oh we've had a whole bunch, they've just never been sitewide brawls like some of the more notable struggle sessions
Book title: The Hellenistic Astrology of Outdoor Cats and Asswiping
The audacity to be born in April. I think someone should kill you
My partner just finished a certificate program for astrology. I was definitely a skeptic but I support her, especially in things she’s passionate about. I’ve come to understand it as basically an elaborate way of tracking patterns in living things from people to stars.
I’m fascinated how the astrological calendar lines up with other calendars. It’s clear Netanyahu is following the Jewish calendar for the war and it’s lined up with events in the astrological calendar. There are indications that something major will happen in the conflict - my guess is agression towards Lebanon - in the next ten days with the fast of the 17th of Tammuz on July 23. The Anaretic Full Moon in Capricorn is on July 21.
That being said, she probably would laugh at the jokes in this thread and loathes armchair internet “astrologers”.
an elaborate way of hallucinating a "pattern"
Or the other way: A built-in schedule to follow, particularly if that schedule comes with predictions of good/bad luck.
Ask em about Geminis.
I used to live with some astrology lesbians and they were very insistent on knowing my exact minute of birth.
No idea what they ended up doing with that information ngl.
You fool, that's all they needed for the ritual to discover your true name, now you've granted them power over yourself!
Oh no, I'm being overpowered by the astrology lesbians? How awful! 
I knew a lady that was a Scorpio. She had a mug with her sign and the little positive traits on it. Absolutely wonderful person and character in her own right. I can imagine it was an annoying thing to hear people talking shit with actual bile-filled intent.
Astrology is just a socially acceptable way to ask when your birthday is.
...and then make sweeping judgements about someone with it.
I just like astrology because I invariably get the dickhead signs in all the different ways people look at it.
Scorpio is the most common sign so hating scorpios is actually elitism or something.
I’m a cancer and that’s the best sign. Suck it
Carcinization
You gotta problem with scorpios???? This is anti-scorpio discrimination! 
What's wrong with Scorpio?
I could care less than the fact that it exists...
That being said, if you're born beyond July 31 and before Jan. 1, your day of birth is probably lame... why didn't ye get out of the womb earlier, plus, it reminds me of the end of summer breaks
Other than that, I don't see anything that stops them from being their own person...
Okay, but do you KNOW Vriska?