Probably a spicy take for those identifying as binary trans women, but i'm at the point where i'm like "there are no binary genders. Men and women exist, but they do not fit into the binary, both are such vast, broad, open-ended labels that get real fuzzy and undefined around the edges once you move away from the traditional, restrictive ways to perform these roles and there's a million different ways to be a woman or to be a man. Why would i assume woman is more clearly and accurately defined than demigirl or genderfae or lesbian-as-a-gender? Why is one a binary label and the others aren't when all exist in people's everyday performative practice, and exist within the same grid that one maps gender onto?" And it works really well for me. Binary is a narrow, ignorant way of thinking about gender, not something an actual, real person can be.

I mean, if somebody needs the safety of saying "i'm a woman and that's a very clearly defined either-or category that i fit into 100%, and it's clearly and 100% in opposite to all i was suppoed to be as an egg", i get that, i used to be at that point as well, but in hindsight that was pretty far from the truth because it was so burdened with oppositional sexism and internalized exorsexism, it was just a safety line i could hold on to early in my transition when i didn't know yet where my journey would take me and what kind of femininity really fit me.