this post was submitted on 05 Oct 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to [email protected]

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

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[–] [email protected] 65 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Rotate 180° and shopped it side to side with Mussolini.

[–] [email protected] 114 points 1 month ago (9 children)
[–] [email protected] 66 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Wow reported to facebook for terrorism, enjoy you're ban.

[–] [email protected] 61 points 1 month ago

banned by the woke police kitty-birthday-sad

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago

:waow-based:

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

lmao I literally had this idea before scrolling down

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 month ago

Or falling into the cuck pit

[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

all the sound effects came to me unprompted. Nice work!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

clicks torso 4 times

[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (1 children)

wtf it took me too long to figure out it was melon-musk

[–] [email protected] 42 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He's still getting mileage out of his "OCCUPY MARS" shirt.

He's always been a piece of shit and he still thinks mocking Occupy Wall Street is quirky.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)

makes sense bc his memes are all from 2013

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Le Epic X goes all the way back to the Xtreme fad of the 90s, which he simply can't let go of as a le epic letter.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Le epic X-treme always makes me think of like early to mid 90s Xmen and Rob Lefield artwork. I cant imagine never growing from that point. Its such a specific aesthetic

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

He takes enough hormone treatments to be like a less-flatteringly-adjusted Rob Liefield character, so that tracks.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago

Because he's the main character, the bestest boy, the very smartest, and his mommy even tweeted so just before he did that jump.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

Even Trump knows he's cringe

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

The theory I subscribe to is he got addicted to internet clout by being offbeat and le random xD with tweens after his PewDiePie appearance.

He was content with cameos on The Big Bang Theory or Iron Man as the South African Thomas Edison (in more ways than one). Someone online redditors and tech bros know as some eccentric rocket/car maker.

But after PewDiePie, he tasted the approval of mainstream children. He was on stage with a modern celebrity tasting modern fandom. He's chased that high ever since. And the more he's chased it the more insufferable he's become to a regular person.

All that's left are people too braindead to see through his PR, who think he's an actual Tony Stark genius, and those same braindead morons are overwhelmingly right wing because once again they're too dumb to not fall for right wing talking points. And of course he's pandering to them, the only people who still like him, because affection is the only thing he can't buy.

Emerald mine money can buy him cars, a PR team, a "founder" title, degrees and a reputation as an epic inventor. But it cannot buy him affection. Not from his children, not from people with an ounce of common sense.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

In this moment, Elon is euphoric. Not because of some phony woke pronouns. But because he has fully self-actualized himself by finally becoming the little fascist he has always wanted to be.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 month ago

I love the look on trumps face. "what the fuck is this disgusting loser doing?"

[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Is he still wearing those boots from when he was pretending to be a cowboy in Texas?

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)

And the fucking buckle.

And the "OCCUPY MARS" super dated attempt to dunk on OWS.

He's a collection of increasingly-expired "cool" attempts that no one around him dares to say otherwise about.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

As someone that bought a buckle like that just to be ironic when I moved to Texas, and as someone that is also shaped like a potato, I can garauntee that thing is digging into his soft marshmallow gut since his shirt isn't tucked in. Uncritical support for the buckle imo.

E: but yeah Melon def want's so hard to be his own action figure lol.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 month ago

Can’t believe someone captured a photograph of the moment Elon Musk sacrificed his own life to take Trump’s third would-be assassin’s bullet. Whatever you want to say about how Musk lived his life, he died a hero.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ozembic face. i seriously didn't recognize him

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

Dude became Andrew Yang

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago

Elon musk’s like the only incomprehensibly powerful guy who you can meme about and it actually mean something (it will offend him)

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago

I believe I can fly

I believe my little wiener can touch the sky

500,000 of my cars burn night and day

Spread my wig and fly away~

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Looks like he lost a few pounds. Good for him I guess.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My main focus for posting that picture is the cartoon supervillain "LOOK MOMMY! I AM THE BESTEST BOY! I WILL SHOW THEM ALL!" energy of this.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah but he does look way less like shit then he did in those yacht photos

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Bleeding edge gender affirmation treatments keep getting better; only the best for a cishet billionaire bigot.

It's a medical arms race against him being a 50something lazy slob, though.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Team ketamine is also highly competitive in the arms race

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

The silver lining of Yankee electoral politics is that whatever happens in November, some of the most cringe-worthy and disgusting people alive are going to be so mad and sore about it.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Richest man serving as a jester for a fascist. Both likely pedos and sex pests

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

Well this kinda reminds me of Goebbels assistant who was a real deal duke, and Goebbels swinged between fawning to him and treating him like disgusting lackey he was.

Not to mention all the industrialists and aristocrats licking boots of various nazi bonzos.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (6 children)

This man is perpetually trying to go back to a time where he was more popular. Doge memes. Libertarians being relevant (le epic Ron Paul and Ron Swanson). Tumblr tier puns (let that sink in). 69/420 funny numbers. Occupy Wall Street. Its as if I can peer into his mind. I see a divorced man, former cool uncle, now going through a midlife crisis, desperately throwing the same memes and references to recapture his former status as "cool".

Man's gonna release a Harlem Shake video with Trump Jr. and Eric in 2024 wearing a Dicks Out For Harambe shirt.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

Whenever you feel your're not good enough, not cool enough, too out of touch, too much of a dork, you just have to remember that Elon exists and immediately you'll feel better about yourself.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What the hell am i looking at?!

If he was actually an "Imperator" as he fancies himself the Preatorian Guard would have axed him and grabbed whoever was next in line to take his place

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Cut him out of this image and put him upside down.

no-fash

EDIT: I scrolled down https://hexbear.net/comment/5470461

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

at this point, soy beans themselves are a mere simulacrum of how fucking soy this image is

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