Welcome to /c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns, an anti-capitalist meme community for transgender and gender diverse people.
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Stay on topic (trans/gender stuff).
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Any image post that gets 200 upvotes with "banner" or "rule 6" in the title becomes the new banner.
Posts about dysphoria/trauma/transphobia should be NSFW tagged for community health purposes.
When made outside of NSFW tagged posts, comments about dysphoria/traumatic/transphobic material should be spoiler tagged.
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Matrix Group Chat:
Suggested Matrix Client: Cinny
https://matrix.to/#/#tracha:chapo.chat
🏳️⚧️ Transmasculine Pride Ring 🏳️⚧️
⬅️ Left 🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈 Be Crime Do Gay Webring 🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈 Right ➡️
SALUTE
I have barely watched Breaking Bad
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
Let's have another good week everyone 
I’m happy with how I look, but why do I still gotta get he/himed. I get why, but it’s annoying.
Always wanted to play ff14 but it seems pretty daunting to get into and I don't know anyone who plays it :/
Working on posting really hard (an unrestrained torrent of stupid bullshit)
voice dysphoria, probably brainworms too tbh
Thinking about my voice just gives me the worst vibes ever. I feel bitter, I feel sad, I feel ruined. I feel resentful and guilty for feeling that way. I knew when my voice started changing I didn't like it, but always hoped I'd grow to like it. That hasn't happened and never will. I have to painstakingly change it to sound okay. Because of how my dysphoria is and all the layers to it I really don't see me ever getting a truly good voice.
I feel numb, in a sad kinda way. spoiler eating issues I'm not going to pro ana post because its bad (I honestly don't really know why what I'm doing is bad but whatever) and I don't want to get banned. But I have eaten one meal and two cookies in the last 36 hours. Next meal is in four hours. My pain is numbed. :::
I opened a big vacuum sealed bag of puffed rice and it tasted funny and i had to put sugar on it :(
nsfw, better mood today
About to hop in the shower pre-laser so my asshole doesn't smell.
Glad I took the time to shave everything yesterday. Gf helped with the hard to reach bits.
Looking forward to having less ass and crotch hair. And a bit anxious as this is my first laser session.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
And I’m supposed to call people “he/him?” 
Okay, look, right, I know Fallout 1's interface is a steampunk artdeco clusterfuck, but it's entirely mouse driven and the game is perfect ok. Yes the click & drag logic is absurd, yes pixel hunting for the Colt Rangemaster sucks, but a nuclear age CRPG with a system inspired by GURPS and structure inspired by JRPGs (overworld map w/random encounters -> town maps with NPCs and quests) is absolutely awesome. The combat never stops being fun in a brutal, pitch black kind of way, and the ability for the story to unfurl with whichever portions of it you find first or quests you choose to do is awesome. Fallout 1 is a top five banger okay, and I will not hear slander about it because Interplay dorks in 1997 made a messy wessy of the buttons at 640x480!!!! 
i've figured out my next "gaming" experiences for the moment!
bought a urban fantasy werewolf game and a game about trying to protect your Jewish village situated on the border between Poland and the Ukraine during the end of the 19th century which is probably going to be difficult considering the period and the...place. 
& 
i do love these Choice of Games, games. 
they unite my favourite two things, reading and fanfiction 
grumbling about shit
so, I said earlier we're close to a formal offer on one place. but one of the big reasons I even picked that place was how close it is to commute for my wife, aaaand now she's going on about wanting a new job in the city to use her degree. which like ok, I get that and it is a good idea outside of this situation; it's just also we're supposed to be moving soon and have a deadline to get shit sorted out, why add more chaos and unknowns to a situation that needs bedrocks?
I don't fault her for wanting to leave her job, but the gripes really are the kinda shit you get at every job 'the management couldn't run a tap' 'this one particular manager is annoying' 'this guy grinds my gears sometimes' that kinda stuff. it's her first job so like I am being supportive with these issues she has, but also easing her into this really is what it's like fucking everywhere you work, and there's a grass is greener on the other side mentality to saying fuck this place I'll go somewhere else. I will 100% support her in the search for a new job, and in terms of getting into the flow of a new workplace, I love her and will always do whatever I can to support that. it's just... do we need that right now with a 2 month deadline over us? I'm no angry with her, more just confused and mildly exhausted with the whole process
I found another 20 places to send off applications too with much better general train access. it's just, this search has been gruling, we're like 90% of the way there on this one place, and now that might be up in the air not due to landlords or estate agents this time. blegh
Feelin' weird
Not really "bad" weird, but "ehhh this is unusual" weird
Mental health/meds/booze
spoiler
Quit drinking entirely this week and stopped taking St. John's Wort and have felt simultaneously kinda lethargic but also a little hyperactive? Keep getting headaches too but I'm not sure if that's just stress or a detoxing from alcohol thing. Mood's decent all things considered but have felt spacey and kinda depersonalized/derealized, like one hit of "the weed that does nothing enjoyable but kinda gives you a headache instantly." I dunno, feels weird
sex... i could take it or leave it. if you know what it is, i mean...
that's gross, i'm sorry.
I ate a gabapentin recently :3 it would be cool to not have occasional collapses of confidence where anxiety eats me and I have to disappear, I hope this will help.
CW; Crimes against humanity, body horror, weirdly personal.
spoiler
Soooo my grandfather was a human test subject on Eniwetok Atoll in the 50s for American nuclear trials. I happen to have polyorchidism. I'm pretty certain it's from radiation causing genetic damage. It gave me a horrible hernia that I had to have fixed at 23. But at the moment my problem is "do they work or not?" I'm on a pretty low dose of E (DIY) and I'm not sure if it's actually suppressing my T production or if I'm just fucking myself up.
My having left for three weeks recently also came with the fun fact that I don’t think I know a lot of people here now. We had one hell of an influx of new posters in the past couple months and that’s pretty damn great. Now I can’t keep up with the mega anymore. Especially since I’ve been horribly busy as well.
When I’m too lazy to read a book I come here, search up the author’s name and wait for the website to tell me if they suck or if they’re good. I am replacing my brain with the hex bear 😀
Morticia and Gomez Adams are a transfeme transmasc couple. I decided it just now
I was in a dark mood last night and I avoided the mega so I wouldn't spread my miasma. Sad I missed the posting last night though