this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2024
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Maps

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A map illustrating the rise and expansion of the Tsardom of Russia under the rule of Ivan IV Vasilyevich (commonly known as The Terrible, from the Russian “grozny“(грозный), Fearsome or Awe-inspiring). Originally a Grand Prince of Moscow, Ivan IV became the first to be crowned and rule as the Tsar of all Russia (from the Latin Caesar), previously a conglomerate of dutchies. He laid the foundation of absolute rule, engaged in a reign of terror against the nobility, reformed the government, opened diplomatic relations with England, wrote music, oversaw cultural and religious renaissance, and aggressively expanded the Russian borders through war and conquest. Shortly after his death (in 1584), Russia entered decades of instability known as The Troubles (Смута) that ended his Rurik dynasty and opened the way for the Romanovs.

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

have been confronted with information that leads me to sincerely believe that I may have been the first ever iPad kid k-pain

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 months ago (1 children)

at least one of them, because apparently I got mine as my primary tool to write (and unintentionally, fuck around) literally a week after it came out. Sorry gamers I was patient zero

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

You know when the iphone and then ipad first came out apple was a premium brand but not yet a titan. So the people who got their products day 1 were a type of guy. Sorry to inform you but your parents spent the mid 00s telling their friends "mac is better because it's easy and intuitive, watch" then did an 11 keystroke hotkey to empty the recycling bin.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I am 100% aware of this fact and have been fully cognizant of this since I was eight years old agni-pain

3rd grader me asking why we can't get a computer that has games while my dad absolutely insists I use the 2009 mactop for its features (I already have an iPad for school so I literally am only going to use it to play games)

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago (3 children)
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[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 months ago (4 children)

World War Z gets funnier every year. In the book - China covered up the zombie disease and let it spread across the world in secret. And it spread via organlegging of presumably falun gong or some bs.

  • the Israelis said "aww shucks" and invited all the palestinians in to their giant anti-zombie wall, then fought a civil war between secular Israeli's and Kahanists over that with the secular Israeli's winning and Palestinian's staying in Israel.

  • Iran nuked Pakistan.

  • America was very effective at combatting the early stages of the zombies with it's very effective spooky special forces guys.

  • German military officers refused to abandon the civilians they were protecting because they felt bad for being Nazis or some bs

  • Russia collapsed in to a medieval Soviet/orthodox theocracy with Putin as Czar or some bullshit.

  • America saved the world with it's plucky courage, national unity, and superipr manufacturing skills.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

If we lived in a just society, we would hold book clubs just for criticizing and making fun of this book and the person who wrote this would be dragged out into the streets and publicly humiliated for writing such a ridiculous, reactionary, American-exceptionalism-brainworms-infested shit book

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Racism is such a goofy ass ideology when you think about what they actually believe. Imagine thinking you're superior to someone for having less melanin? If someone came up with that shit in a book/other work of fiction they'd get laughed at for making something so stupid. "It's unrealistic, no one would ever believe that," people would say.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Google is so fucking useless nowadays, almost all the results are scam websites or something unrelated.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

In 2006, before the iphone came out, mac guy was a type of guy. Basically just a gentrified linux guy.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

lol remembering those obnoxious mac vs pc ads with justin long

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Content warning: Mild hate crime(?), Racism, Islamophobia

spoilerPlease excuse me if this post is unorganized I am venting. I was walking from work today and some old fuck told to me (a hijabi) that "I bet you support those Hamas terrorists." At first it didn't register to me as I was completely off guard and was daydreaming but by the time I realized he quickly walked away. Honestly I felt like I should said something but I just wasn't expecting as I have seen this man multiple times and he has never spoken to me. I really feel like I am making a big deal out of it but it is really bothering me to the point of sleeplessness. I really hate living in a small city in Canada. kkkanada

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

HockHam's Razor: When trying to understand or resolve a situation, the approach that involves the least effort and gets them out of work quickest is the one cops will always choose.

"Oh, the murder you called to report? Uhh yeah, turns out you did it. It was almost the perfect cover, you sick fuck."

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

L Musk in his quest to make twitter worse has made likes private, now you cant judge people for liking nazi edits and other bad shit, this probably to help his many nazi friends

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (9 children)

Happy Pride nerds flag-genderqueer-pride flag-genderfluid-pride flag-gay-pride flag-gay-pride-mlm flag-demi-pride flag-bi-pride flag-asexual-pride flag-aromantic-pride flag-agender-pride flag-intersex-pride flag-lesbian-pride flag-non-binary-pride flag-pan-pride flag-trans-pride

New Megathread nerds!

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@[email protected]

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No current struggle session discussion here on the new general megathread, i will ban you from the comm and remove your comment, have a good day/night :meow-coffee:

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

why does my friend get shown all sorts of super cool communists on his dating app while my profile (same app, neither of us pay) gets nothing but 'i like expensive vacations and margaritas and sports and JESUS' profiles shown to it

also how tf are you supposed to meet people irl without alcohol being involved

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I went to my local pub today, and some guy wanted to talk about politics

After a while he asked if I was an anarchist, I replied that no, I'm a communist

His retort was to ask the (asian, I've no idea of his country of origin) owner of the pub because "he escaped communism"

The owner replied "he's always lying"

The sad part is that the guy I was arguing with told a couple of minutes earlier that he was living on $700/month

I almost said that I'm six times better capitalist worker based on income (in all honesty it would have been infinity because he's living on social security) but I just said good night to the owner and left

Brainwashing and pride is the downfall of the proletariat

The moral of the story is to keep fighting even for these misinformed jackasses, they deserve better despite their ignorance

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

Sometimes I think people are afraid to admit that the system is designed to hold them down, because that's a scarier concept than "just not quite having struck it rich yet..."

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

it is june 12 and stalin saved the world from fascism

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Love that feeling when you go hang out with people and you realize how futile all of this is, how you've built up a tolerance for appreciating "little moments", and how you have no love in your heart for anything anymore.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

tried orange chicken for the first time. it's good yummy

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

Beating the picky eater allegations.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (5 children)

Someone please tell me how the fuck people are continuing to pay attention to professional sports while the US continues to degrade at an unfathomable rate

Maybe I’m just getting old, but I thought watching millionaires paid by billionaires play a game for entertainment would lose value when owning a house is a pipe dream and rent continues to increase (despite the price being completely detached from reality)

COVID should’ve shown EVERYONE that professional athletes don’t satisfy a societal need whatsoever. Every “need” in this godamned country is a treat

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

it is june 12 and stalin saved the world from fascism

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (5 children)

I went on a dating app date. It was like if reddit was a woman. She was scared of public transit and at some point made what I think were jokes about homeless naked people. She loves Hamilton. I thanked her for her time and had to go.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Why do boomers keep falling for these AI generated images of crying babies carving out the face of jesus christ and the sort? Can they no longer differentiate between reality and the facebook matrix 1984?

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

tried to carve an S for spanakopita on top of my spanikopita but i forgot how carving letters work so its a Z

scared my spanakopita supports Putler boohoo

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Just watched Civil War. Dumb. As if there would be any resistance whatsoever to a fascist takeover of the usa.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (5 children)

Disney, Australian government and George Miller, give me the funding and permission to make a post-post-apocalypse mini-series set a thousand years after Fury Road where a Citadel History-Woman is trying to piece together whether Max was a real person or a shared mythology.

Like the descendants of the Northern Tribes call him the Road Warrior and he's a martial god. Barter town called him the Raggedy Man and he's a malevolent trickster figure. He's also known as Captain Walker for some reason in two completely different geographic locations (ones who stayed, ones who left). People in the citadel can't agree on if he was real or if Praetorian Jack or Dementus are versions of him.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

The Black Lives Matter and Thin Blue Line flag combo, cursed as fuck and never seen it myself before today. Not even darkly funny like the TBL/Gadsden combo I see all the time around here

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago (5 children)

Finding a completely incomprehensible internet rabbithole right before going to sleep

dog-screm

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I can't wait to just die the most meaningless death possible. My wife is gonna send me out to get oregano or something and I'm gonna trip over my own shoelaces into a ravine and die.

Fuck meaning, just let it be so random and pointless.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

fuck landlords
fuck cars

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

This friggin creep keeps emailing me asking to smell my hair

biden-nibble

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

maddened damn you megathread, locking when i want to reply to the replies to my late night drunk posts! maddened

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (4 children)

The thin man from Xcom is a trans woman because they turn into snake women in Xcom 2.

Alien HRT is really powerful stuff.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

Free energy deniers when two loved ones cook each other food (the amount of love and joy produced is much higher than the input)

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Listening to old matt-jokerfied streams again. Been very overwhelmed with a lot of stuff in my life and the world, but the vlogs always seem to bring some sort of clarity. God damn I miss him.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

90s rad surfer voice: Yeah, the future's gunna be so sick! We'll all commute on the information superhighway to our jobs on the 'net!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

For this megathread I'd like to mention the classic Soviet comedy Ivan Vasilyevich Changes His Profession (Иван Васильевич Меняет Профессию) (1973). A Soviet scientist invents a time machine and accidentally swaps eras with Ivan the Terrible.

At 6:04 you get this banger

And at 44:09 there's this one (Kap-kap-kap)

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

I dated a black woman for a short period of time and the only time I ever got visibly angry on a date was when she said that "white people don't like mayonnaise."

That shot me up to the top of socially acceptable anger for like 10 straight minutes.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

Based king cringe skibidi gigachad rizzler gyatt

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They blew John F. Kennedy's head to kill the brain worm illuminati

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