Welcome to /c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns, an anti-capitalist meme community for transgender and gender diverse people.
Please follow the Hexbear Code of Conduct
Selfies are not permitted for the personal safety of users.
No personal identifying information may be posted or commented.
Stay on topic (trans/gender stuff).
Bring a trans friend!
Any image post that gets 200 upvotes with "banner" or "rule 6" in the title becomes the new banner.
Posts about dysphoria/trauma/transphobia should be NSFW tagged for community health purposes.
When made outside of NSFW tagged posts, comments about dysphoria/traumatic/transphobic material should be spoiler tagged.
While this is mostly a meme community, we allow most trans related posts as we grow the trans community on the fediverse.
If you need your neopronouns added to the list, please contact the site admins.
Remember to report rulebreaking posts, don't assume someone else has already done it!
Matrix Group Chat:
Suggested Matrix Client: Cinny
https://matrix.to/#/#tracha:chapo.chat
WEBRINGS:
her,,, expolde
Join our puplic Matrix server! https://matrix.to/#/#tracha:chapo.chat
As a reminder, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
hi, does anyone wanna make the mega in the upcoming weeks? if so, reply to this post and i'll add you to the list!
the list as it stands:
* after name denotes someone who has posted before and will be skipped by first-time posters
Just finished listing an inordinate amount of my personal belongings on eBay. I forgot how long it takes even if I just leave a couple sentences of description. Gods that was mind numbing. Well, at least I'll have more money to financially stabilize my family and/or pay for my surgery here in a couple months. Or maybe get some more plastic crack in the form of more Rubrics. Look, I need a third squad of them. No I don't need to explain myself, I just do.
Never seen the trans mega post so hard on sunday night tbh.
it's monday actually and I'm not at work due to sick so i gotta spend my time doing something
I had a strong urge to Post today
Posting Power 
Having a lot of gender thoughts and stuff about sexuality and hegemonic cis/heteronormative reinforcement as a factor in the social reproduction of the labor force, how that has shifted in the US since WW2 from Keynesianism to neoliberalism alongside the womens' liberation and gay rights movements in the 60s and 70s, how trans rights became more visible in mainstream culture after the 2008 crash and overtook gay marriage as the favorite reactionary backlash target in the US after the Obergefell decision, tepid liberal co-opting of radical movements, pinkwashing and rainbow capitalism's relation to HR department culture and the discourse over the character of the PMC as a distinct subclass, reactionary backlash to nebulous "wokeness" and what if any material basis that has in economic relations or social reproduction, and so on and so on...
But I'm really eepy and don't wanna try writing a long thing on a phone keyboard and I feel like I need to read more theory and try to flesh out what I'm cooking up more
It's finally autumn outside! 
too bad i have to stay inside to fully eradicate this fucking cold, but soon
I've shared so much random shit about myself on the trans mega and yet sharing my oc's is still incredibly nerve-wracking 
just to say i loved reading your oc’s. 
I'm glad you liked my posting 
Powerful posting. We got the best posters.
Gotta kill the part of my head that tells me that everyone's going to judge me and find me silly for the simple happiness of... making up stories.
I couldn’t wait until Thursday
A few months ago I commissioned from jo_vixen_ on twitter this piece based on a photo of myself. In lieu of payment at the time she was taking proof of donation to medical aid for Palestine. I think it’s neat.
::: spoiler (CW NSFW BDSM partial nudity).
... I haven't checked one of my emails regularly in years. Apparently my old boss was emailing me earlier this year, asking if I wanted a summer position, even though I completely ghosted her during the period of time I was experiencing housing insecurity last year because I had no idea how to respond.
Anyways, maybe this means that my old job will still want me back for next summer. Maybe. I don't know.
sui ideation (NOT SERIOUS AT ALL)
sometimes i feel so embarrassed that I just want to kill myself lol
I'm movin' different, this shit ain't nothin' to me, I'm not a man. I'm a doggirl.
CW: DIY, PTSD
update on me
spoiler
partner starts new job tomarrow. of course something in the house broke recently but assuming she has steady decent paychecks i can finally get some girl juice and start this thang
still going DIY route just seems safer as far as being on lists but maybe not for medical reasons. still have the option to go the route my co-worker went or contact my ex from high school who is a social worker that helps trans people connect with medical resources. we broke up nearly 2 decades ago and i think im the reason she went into that field so i'm sure she'd be delighted to help
still feel like im making up excuses sometimes but i do have some legit fears i need to overcome first that are rooted in some PTSD stuff
About a month ago, I told my wife she can use he/she/they pronouns for me.
She pretty much exclusively uses she/her and calls me her wife.
Chat, what does this mean?
i don’t care, i’ll inject the whole fucking vial. this shit ain’t nothing to me, man
Ok. Let me share a few more portraits with you all before I ~~sleep~~ do my schoolwork:
New and (maybe) Improved
And one of the main characters:
I don't quite know how to feel about it, and I was running out of time tonight, so these ones are probably more subject to change. I'm not sure if I want to go with that face, or that hair, or those colors to be honest. I just picked something and went with it. I think I still like my first character better, though maybe it's because she felt easier to design.
Edit: I think the gray color scheme is bothering me, I might have to change it to some sort of color, though I have no idea what. My brain does not process these kinds of things well (I'm not colorblind). Maybe I just need to read some (color) theory, that might help.
Uh I miss lifting. I started lifting and got sick basically two days later, but I could literally feel my arms becoming more firm which was incredible. Had to go catching a stupid whatever because it got cold overnight, ugh. I don't wanna do anything to strain myself so...
I have stopped lifting because of my horrible schedule right now and also overall tired, I do wish I'd find a closer gym and get into it again
I tried making air fried beer donuts and ended up making beer biscuits instead, think it was because I forgot to add butter. Softest biscuits ever, at least I have that going for me.
#WritinInBiden
I started orange book like "hmm, I don't think I relate to Maria much besides the sardonic inner voice part"
i'm almost done with part 1 and god the more I read the more I find things in her life that are 1 to 1 with my life, down to her fashion and music taste. the only thing is that i'm not transfem, i'm in the bracket of vaguely genderqueer transmasc-ish nonbinary that she is critical of, lol. and i listen to more goth music.
I didn't relate hugely to her but there are some elements here or there that I did relate to, enjoyed it thoroughly too.
goth music
Aww yeah 
TO posting because i need a distraction
spoiler
i bought a dragon, and it is level 1 (lol) and i'm currently watching it do 5 damage to a soldier with its fire breath. this game slaps, im staying up late
Oh god I fucking hate training beast units, I never used em. Critical support to fielding dragons, waow...
dysphoria
Today has been very iffy for me, then I talked for a little bit and holy shit my voice is awful. Feel really sad about it now. I've never done any voice training, no clue when I'll actually start.
Also the hair on my arms is starting to come back, little black stubs right now. Egh.
At least the really bad thoughts/fantasies are gone right now, those are always really upsetting.
I want to dress cuter but also don't want to be overtly trans to my class that's already giving me trouble. Any tips?
Cute socks! Don't even have to be the programmer socks; just some crew socks with patterns or stripes are good. I realized recently that leveling up my sock game went a great way towards making me feel like my outfits were cuter.
I have found the magical T-shirt I mentioned earlier. The person has a twitter and just didn't mention the shirts being on a different website, so uh, interesting decision
sunday night blues, angry, sad, whining from a place of extreme privilege, don't read
i don't want to work tomorrow. i don't care how much i get paid, my job sucks. i waste my whole life in meetings masking when i could be girlplaying video games, reading about autism, coding games, infodumping about programming online, watching One Piece, catching up on the huge backlog of communist theory I need to read to stop being such a lib, or listening to people. most of it these days at work is me trying to figure out wtf me and the people i'm responsible for are supposed to do with our time since no one tells me what the hell the priorities are any more. i'm just supposed to 
, apparently.
oh yes, i'm so fucking empowered, except that if i guess wrong on which damn tickets a choose then people are gonna be mad, right? so in fact it's worse than if someone were trying to tell me what to do. who's even making the decisions? is it me? how am i supposed to decide? i don't care about the profits of this company lol, it's literally not doing anything that matters for the world. even if i did, barely anything i'm responsible for does numbers anyway, it's just tools that make other peoples' job easier. and, i just bought an entire whiteboard to keep track of who the hell i'm waiting for on each piece of work that anyone has ever mentioned that we could be doing.
i took a promotion while i was still a lib and barrelled into all of this PMC crap because the company can't keep dev managers around (perhaps ... due to the ambiguity of the work...?) and i like making technical decisions (ie. doing the one thing i'm good at in people's general direction). only reason i'm still at this job is that they pay me a lot and i can work from home and the PTO is like super generous for even my country, and I guess I feel responsible for the projects and people I've worked with/hired at this company. nobody micromanages me either, which is helpful since i struggle to be told what to do.
but i do have to do pointless paperwork each month that's filled with ambiguity. and budgeting for projects (no one has ever told me how to do this btw). i also have to decide raises, but i don't actually decide them, the cto does, so i guess there's like a magic number that i'm not allowed to know that i'm not supposed to go over. tech needs to fucking unionize so bad, i am so not qualified to argue with my boss about who "deserves" raises, wtf does that even mean?! everyone deserves them! in every job!! make the company a fucking worker's co-op instead of a subsidiary of a publicly traded dumb corp, and divide the profits amongst the workers, or something! why am i still working here and enabling this shitty system? i am the worst communist 
looking forward to wasting the night counting down the minutes though until i have to go to bed at a "reasonable" time so that i can wake up and struggle to even half-ass the literally easiest and cushiest job on the earth.
my dad is retiring at the end of this month. him and I were talking about linux today, he's been working with Microsoft shit his whole life and he says he's just so done with the tech industry and he's basically given up working for good, and he hates his job too. he's excited to explore tech again now that he's not having to do tech for work. i mean i'm happy for him, but all i can really think about is more years to go for me, and the fact that it's only years is also horrible because how did i get to mid-30s and still be so broken?... it's my birthday this week btw, so as usual i'm just going to be grumpy for most of it. another year stuck doing things i don't want to do, affecting no positive change on the world, being scared for marginalized people the world over and not being able to do anything about it except try to treat the very few people that I can well, and i can't escape the lingering questions about whether or not i'm actually making things better, and what i can even do about that that's within my abilities.
my partner has reminded me that i made a lot of personal progress this year so i will... 
reluctantly admit that he is right. i guess that is positive, at least.
is this the right place for a post like this or idk how bear site works
Realizing that taking sculpture was a mistake. I thought I would enjoy 3D art the same way I enjoy 2D, and I just... don't. Maybe I have to do it more and I'll get into it, but so far I'm not having much fun.
damn that girl in the mirror is starting to get an ass, god damn
Why does this video do something for me?
I click on it every time youtube puts it on my feed.
because you're a lesbian?
